National Politics - 2016

What Happens When Sarah Palin’s Teleprompter Breaks

IT ISN’T PRETTY … || By FITSNEWS || Moments after expressing her serious interest in a campaign for the presidency (of the United States, not the Alaska Tea Party), former GOP vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin delivered an address to the Iowa Freedom Summit. How’d it go? Not exceedingly well…

IT ISN’T PRETTY …

|| By FITSNEWS || Moments after expressing her serious interest in a campaign for the presidency (of the United States, not the Alaska Tea Party), former GOP vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin delivered an address to the Iowa Freedom Summit.

How’d it go?

Not exceedingly well … especially after Palin’s Teleprompter reportedly froze mid-speech.

Palin was dishing out the red meat in heaping handfuls to the early-voting faithful in Iowa – discussing her views on energy issues and “this subjective income gap that we’re supposed to be obsessed with right now.”

(A.k.a. this).

“No … we get on offense and we drive in solutions – and we be bold,” Palin said.

Huh? “We be bold?”

Ummmm …

“Things must change for this cover … for our government,” Palin continued.  “Look at it.  It isn’t too big to fail.  It’s too big to succeed!  It’s too big to succeed, so we can afford no retreads … or nothing will change with the same people and same policies that got us … into this, this status quo.  Another Latin word, status quo, and it stands for, ‘Man, the middle-class everyday Americans are really gettin’ taken for a ride.’”

Uhhhhh …

“That’s status quo, and GOP leaders, by the way … y’know the man can only ride ya when your back is bent,” Palin added.  “So strengthen it.  Then the man can’t ride ya, America won’t be taken for a ride, because so much is at stake and we can’t afford politicians playing games like nothing more is at stake than, oh, maybe just the next standing of theirs in the next election.”

Look, we agree.  GOP retreads and their status quo policies are absolutely screwing over the middle class (hence our focus on that “subjective income gap,” among other fundamental injustices in the system).  So Palin is absolutely correct to rail on the politicians perpetuating these failed policies.

But come on, girlfriend … at least sound like you’ve got a clue.

The fun starts right around the 28:00 mark …

(Click to play)

(Vid: Via)

“Palin had a chance (several chances, actually) to emerge as a substantive figure on the national political scene … and didn’t.” we wrote last summer.

Earlier this week we added that we didn’t “see the 50-year-old’s prospective 2016 presidential bid as doing anything to change that perceived lack of gravitas,” which appears to be especially true when her Teleprompter malfunctions.

Palin is correct that “Republicans” don’t need to nominate a retread … but they don’t need to nominate a retard either.

***

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99 comments

Nölff January 27, 2015 at 4:42 pm

Ha! she disses the preznit’s teleprompter all the time.

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SCYankee99! January 27, 2015 at 4:45 pm

“we be bold”?…..was she reading off of obama’s teleprompter?

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That pic isn't sexy... January 27, 2015 at 4:53 pm

That chick in your masturbatory avatar looks like she’s letting out a fart.

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Squishy123 January 27, 2015 at 5:36 pm

She’s wiping her ass.

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Don't Flush It! January 28, 2015 at 10:53 am

We may have found Sarah Palin’s running mate.

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SCYankee99! January 27, 2015 at 7:51 pm

indeed it does….Megyn Kelly, the same stuff that comes out of her ass comes out of her mouth

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Buz Martin January 28, 2015 at 9:43 am

I did a photoshopped version of that pic, with a fart sound effect.

Kelley’s hot, though. She’d be a far better candidate than Palin. That photo would be be out there, bigtime, in an attempt to hurt her, but probably would not.

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SCYankee99! January 27, 2015 at 8:27 pm

she’s just blowing you a kiss…

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Jonny Logic January 27, 2015 at 4:46 pm

She should be the party’s nominee. She is the perfect embodiment of a party that has done absolutely nothing for this country. Republicans used to at least accidently benefit those in the 99%, but now they literally provide nothing except rhetoric and the occasional tax benefit for the wealthy.

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I'm High January 27, 2015 at 4:50 pm

This is performance art at it’s finest. The Sarah Palin character will be remembered like Mark Twain a hundred years from now.

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Gregory Geddings January 27, 2015 at 5:01 pm

Except that Mark Twain was a creative genius and Sarah Palin is a blubbering moron.

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I'm High January 27, 2015 at 6:18 pm

Sarcasm. It ain’t for the stupid.

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:) January 27, 2015 at 6:52 pm

There’s a reason his nickname is “ZTAC”.

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Gregory Geddings January 28, 2015 at 6:58 am

Your mom calls me “Stud”…especially when I show up at her cardboard box with a busload of winos, a camera crew, a bag of wooden nickels, and some out-of-date Cheetos

guest January 28, 2015 at 7:14 am

What does your boyfriend call you?

:) January 28, 2015 at 8:34 am

I don’t have a “Mom”. I’m a product of a gay household, but you’re right, my gay Dad did call you “Studfinder”.

I’m living the Progressive dream.

Gregory Geddings January 28, 2015 at 12:46 pm

Oh, I get it…you were an artificially inseminated butt baby. Considering the outcome, a turkey baster would probably have worked better than a long-neck Molson bottle.

:) January 28, 2015 at 1:33 pm

If anyone knows, my Dad says it’s you.

He said it was the hottest gay street bum sex he’s ever had.

Gregory Geddings January 28, 2015 at 6:55 am

Yes, you are high and exceptionally inept in phrasing your initial comment to appear as if you are anything but a nitwit.

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High but smarter January 28, 2015 at 7:05 am

OK? lol. Don’t get all butt hurt. Don’t blame your lack of compression on my phrasing. You a little dim, it’s OK ;-)

FastEddy23 January 27, 2015 at 9:59 pm

Yes … And she will be remembered more than Al Sharpened, Jesu Jackson, what’s her face Washermen-Shults, Meshelle O. Brama … and Clyde Barrow.

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Rocky January 27, 2015 at 10:59 pm

Except that Washermen-Shults gets re-elected and is likely to beat Rubio for the Senate seat. Sarah couldn’t beat a one-legged cat in a wrestling match in a butter bath – but it would be fun to watch. I wonder if she’d call it buttered, or margarinized.

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guest January 28, 2015 at 7:19 am

You know about as much about politics as you do the economy.
Wasserman-Slut has as much chance of defeating Rubio as Fitzgerald did of defeating Kasich in Ohio.
Haley? Thought she was elected governor?

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Thanks, Obam- I Mean Kasich! January 28, 2015 at 10:50 am

How’s that medicaid expansion workin for ya?

Gregory Geddings January 28, 2015 at 12:48 pm

Not so good. He found out penis extensions were not covered.

jimlewisowb January 27, 2015 at 4:51 pm

“….we be bold…”

we be like to see Palin for POTUS and Hailey for VPOTUS

would give new twist on the old saying – kill two bitches with one stone

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Elfego January 27, 2015 at 5:07 pm

Yo Mama!

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mamatiger92 January 27, 2015 at 5:09 pm

sounds like a rap song

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Squishy123 January 27, 2015 at 5:35 pm

Maybe there was a black person in the audience and she wanted to reach out to everyone there.

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Cock & Coke January 27, 2015 at 6:52 pm

“Glen Rice”

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Limbaughsaphatkhunt January 27, 2015 at 8:41 pm

Well played sir. Something…something “womb shifter”

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Buz Martin January 28, 2015 at 9:39 am

“We be bold” is awkward phrasing that a speech writer would never have written for her. But it is not grammatically incorrect. It wasn’t meant as “we are bold”, but as “we must be bold”, with the “must” understood. Um. Not understood well enough, obviously. Still sounded dumb and reads dumb. But what about those tits, huh?

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sparklecity January 28, 2015 at 11:58 am

Yep, that’s a first class front end job – kinda like Demi Moore in “Striptease’

Demi got her money’s worth fer sure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Tits or GTFO! January 27, 2015 at 4:51 pm

Yea, ok…but look at those tits!

That’s the reason she should lead the GOP right there.

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Buz Martin January 28, 2015 at 9:29 am

She may have spoken gibberish, but talking about being ridden by the man, with those tits sticking out there like that … well, lots of guys liked the speech anyway. I like her better with the sound off. She does not know how to use a microphone. Won’t let it do the heavy lifting, seems to think she has to shout her message in that shrill voice. Bring the voice down an octave, speak normally but decisively, and she’s on the mark. Still talking mostly bullhit, but it’s more effective.

If I were her handler, I’d get her to use a hand-held. Unconventional, but hey, she’s supposed to be all mavericky. I’d have her practice with something else, though. Let’s call it an organic hand-held. Haw!

(She deserves no better than this, so I make no apologies for any of the above.)

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Same ol' Same ol' January 28, 2015 at 3:23 pm

MILFtastic. Was she saying something?

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E Norma Scok January 28, 2015 at 10:35 pm

You old effers are really hard up, aren’t you? That chick has used her vagina like a clown car. I’d imagine those are the sloppiest set of pancake B’s ever seen.

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southmauldin January 27, 2015 at 5:01 pm

I remember her making fun of Obama’s teleprompter. At least he can improvise, while she does, uh, this. The fact that she received a standing ovation when finished shows you all you need to know about the crowd. She’s half a step above a televangelist at this point.

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guest January 28, 2015 at 7:20 am

Liars don’t have a problem ‘improvising’.

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Years of Experience January 28, 2015 at 10:52 am

Thanks for your input as a professional.

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Exit Stage Right January 27, 2015 at 5:02 pm

There comes a time to exit the stage,especially for one who never should have been on it anyway.

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mamatiger92 January 27, 2015 at 5:09 pm

Hahaha! That is awesome. Crying here.

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mamatiger92 January 27, 2015 at 5:11 pm

Then “The Man” can’t ride ya…

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Slim Shady January 27, 2015 at 5:15 pm

Palin/Hailey !

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Pablo January 27, 2015 at 5:27 pm

Sarah Palin = ESL

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GrandTango January 27, 2015 at 5:30 pm

For people who wail away about how irrelevant Palin is…you D*#n sure seem to be pre-occupied w/ her….

Is Sanford and his Boy still P!$$#D at Palin for all but ELECTING Haley??…

If the very vulnerable Sanford does not watch out, Palin may campaign for a Sanford opponent…and how is it going to work out w/ FITS and and the Lover-o- Latinos, App-Trail hiking, Line-Crosser working elbow-to-elbow in the Irmo Double-wide…w/ Karl Marx breathing own your necks, running roughshod on libel control…….???….LMAO….

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Rocky January 27, 2015 at 11:03 pm

it’s the tits.

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guest January 28, 2015 at 7:23 am

I love it when you homo’s pretend to appreciate the female anatomy!

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FastEddy23 January 28, 2015 at 1:39 pm

Both right = a point apiece = two points.

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GrandTango January 27, 2015 at 5:33 pm

Don’t click Salon.com EVER…unless you want to see what CREEPS look like…

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Torch January 27, 2015 at 7:05 pm

Is there a picture of Mulvaney there?

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Saluda Rapids January 27, 2015 at 7:45 pm

Same for SCSPD…except there are no photos, no name of the guy authoring the “blog,” no way to post comments. Oh, and wait, no more “blog.” LMAO!

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GrandTango January 28, 2015 at 6:27 am

Not sure I’ve ever seen anyone as entrenched in hate as you…yet so intellectually unable to deal with it…
Hate, when you’re stupid, is reminiscent of the KKK, Louis Farrakhan, or Al Sharpton…LMAO…
I’m just glad that I make you manifest it…

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Smirks January 28, 2015 at 9:19 am

Not sure I’ve ever seen anyone as entrenched in hate as you…

Never seen a mirror I take it?

Squishy123 January 27, 2015 at 5:34 pm

Obama’s worst nightmare.

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FastEddy23 January 27, 2015 at 9:54 pm

Hillary’s too.

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sheejus January 27, 2015 at 11:59 pm

And mine, as well as about 300 million plus Americans

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Clarendonian January 27, 2015 at 5:43 pm

“But come on, girlfriend … at least sound like you’ve got a clue.”

What in the past, pray tell, would suggest to you that she has a clue about anything?

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Republican Follies January 27, 2015 at 6:23 pm

Good point.

A few days ago Fits was pumping her up bizarrely as heading up a Third Party movement.

Today?Shes retarded.

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RHood2 January 27, 2015 at 5:43 pm

Didn’t she criticize Obama for being Mr. Teleprompter? That he couldn’t really think without one.
GOP Hypocrisy again.

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guest January 28, 2015 at 7:05 am

I think the ’57’ state thing and Navy ‘CORPS’MEN gave Muslim Obama away.

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RHood2 January 28, 2015 at 5:49 pm

An occasional slip of the tongue can be forgiven in anybody. But W. and Palin? They are pathological in it.

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GrandTango January 27, 2015 at 5:45 pm

Look at Palin…then look at Hillary…

If you are still bashing Palin…and swearing allegiance to Hillary…that proves -w/o a doubt – liberalism is a mental illness…LMAO…

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GOP: Next!! January 27, 2015 at 6:17 pm

Hillary could lose have her brain and still pull better sentences together…Palin stumbled aroud more than a fucking frat boy. How many clowns are in this circus you call the Republican Party already?

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GrandTango January 27, 2015 at 6:43 pm

Good point…Hillary just repeats “What difference does it make?” or “I don’t recall”…over and over, and she’s a goddess to the Dumb@$$#$ who support her…

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Try To Keep Up January 28, 2015 at 9:44 am

Salient point there, GT. With this I will agree. It’s PDS, Palin Derangement Syndrome.
Love the symbols, BTW.

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FastEddy23 January 28, 2015 at 1:37 pm

… Learned from Bill: “It depends on what is, is …”.

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mamatiger92 January 27, 2015 at 7:33 pm

Only half?

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FastEddy23 January 28, 2015 at 1:33 pm

And you?

How many Helots are in that circus you call the “progressive” Fascist Party already?

Hillary DID lose half her brain … That’s why she was out sick a few weeks ago. (She is still MIA today.)

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Rocky January 27, 2015 at 11:02 pm

We be bold. We be brawling near da limo. We be hunting wolves. We be trashin’ that bastard that knocked up my daughter. We NOT be winning the election.

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Crooner January 27, 2015 at 5:52 pm

When that happens again, and it will, she need just step out from behind the podium and twerk once or twice, and NO ONE will remember what she said.

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Limbaughsaphatkhunt January 27, 2015 at 5:58 pm

Remember when she was the fucking Vice Presidential candidate? What in the world was McCain thinking. I mean she had millions of people hanging on every word and was a force for real ‘Muricans. It shows just how fucked our country is that this total and complete imbecile could be the VP pick let alone manage a local 7-11.

“This is the end….beautiful friend…”

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E Norma Scok January 28, 2015 at 10:32 pm

And then they voted a community organizer into office.

Twice.

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Limbaughsaphatkhunt January 28, 2015 at 10:35 pm

You mean former US Senator?

As opposed to a two bit mayor of an Alaskan meth pit who quit mid-term?

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novatom January 29, 2015 at 9:23 am

It least it didn’t require a decision from the Supreme Court. And frankly all this BS about Obama being a “community organizer” is just that. A community organizer works at the grass roots level to build support for issues and solve real problems. They actually have daily contact with the “real people” (not my words, the GOP’s) That’s a plus in my book.

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John Boy January 27, 2015 at 5:59 pm

Seriously, what the fuck was McCain thinking allowing this dumb shit stick to ride the national circuit? I was hoping she’d just disappear, but he’ll no, people like Fits, Fox, and even the Liberal media keep throwing her bones. Well, now the idiot has presidential designs…if only we would have ignored her. At least she’s good a comedy, huh?

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Let Rover take over January 27, 2015 at 6:50 pm

I’ll throw her a bone.

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Let Rover take over January 27, 2015 at 6:50 pm

*rimshot*

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nitrat January 27, 2015 at 6:59 pm

I don’t see how McCain can take himself seriously after picking Palin.
He should have slithered off to one of his homes after that…or, returned to his old lounge lizard ways.

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Manray9 January 28, 2015 at 11:15 am

McCain had credibility with me until the selection of Palin. That act was so desperate and so irresponsible that he has forfeited the right to be taken seriously on national issues.

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sparklecity January 28, 2015 at 11:52 am

Sadly I agree.
i supported him (financially & risked being arrested for being on a traffic island holding a campaign sign) when he was in the primary against Bush II here in SC back in 2000 and at the start of his second try at the White House till he picked her crazy ass.
i did not vote for him because of her crazy ass (even if she is a MILF).

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Bible Thumper January 27, 2015 at 10:48 pm

You don’t know what you’re talking about. Palin is a multi million dollar brand. She’s an industry. Paris Hilton was a flash in the pan in comparison. She is bigger than Honey Boo boo. The only one whose got her beat is Kim Kardashian.

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guest January 28, 2015 at 7:12 am

Biden? The plagiarizing bigot that had part of his brain removed? Now we add Hillary to the mix after she had her ‘head injury’? What a pair.They both belong in an assisted living facility yet they want to be President.

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John Boy January 28, 2015 at 12:12 pm

You so funny…”Feb 13, 2014 – Kentucky Republican Sen. Rand Paul is once again facing plagiarism allegations — this time regarding a suit he filed earlier this week against …”

Now as for head injuries: Reagan did pretty well considering he didn’t know who or where he was in office.

Troll, Troll, Troll your boat…

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guest January 28, 2015 at 12:19 pm

Alzheimer’s can rob someone of their mind-not their heart and soul.
Reagan was a Godly man that loved his country. Biden, like most Democrats elected to public office, is a souless and evil creature.

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Buz Martin January 28, 2015 at 9:20 am

I’d throw her a bone too.

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nitrat January 27, 2015 at 6:57 pm

Her head’s been looking too big and her arms too scrawny for so long, I thought meth was the likely problem.

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FastEddy23 January 27, 2015 at 9:52 pm

That’s from bear wrastlin’ …

Yes, she’s ready!

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euwe max January 27, 2015 at 9:56 pm

Isn’t she a retread?

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Beartrkkr January 27, 2015 at 11:11 pm

Obama bad, taxes bad, drill baby drill, uh, uh, taxes bad, Obama bad…you betcha.

Lather, rinse, repeat.

Gotta be the second coming of the “Great Communicator.”

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Mr. WordNerd January 28, 2015 at 5:06 am

May have seemed a bit of a ramble, but in one of the “strange” remarks she was actually referring to a quote by Martin Luther King, Jr. She just delivered it out of any context:
“Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability, but comes through continuous struggle. And so we must straighten our backs and work for our freedom. A man can’t ride you unless your back is bent.”

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Rocky January 28, 2015 at 9:29 am

Sarah’s typical speech – As I look out over our country, we see the threats this President has brought to our shores, our open borders, Zales is having a sale and the man is on my back, back on my man, stiffen up, I say, to those who seek to steal our liberties, the founding fathers, those valient men, who road horses, they knew the value of a Ruble, and drilled for oil in Cape Cod, thank you, and let’s not forget, uhm, coffee with cream is good.

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Manray9 January 28, 2015 at 11:13 am

All Americans should thank John McCain who, in his desperation to salvage his hopeless presidential campaign, brought this dolt to the national scene. Late night comics should be especially thankful. They should get together and create the “John McCain Award” to give each year to the greatest bumbling ass brought to comedic glory in the world of politics or government. Past winners could have been: Anthony Wiener, Mark Sanford, and Larry (Wide Stance) Craig.

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SCBlueWoman January 28, 2015 at 2:36 pm

Any woman on the ticket will get the women’s votes. That was what he was thinking. Typical Republican.

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SarahP January 28, 2015 at 12:59 pm

And don’t ask me about newspapers. I don’t read newspapers. They use big words and facts to confuse conservatives. I watch real journalist like Sean Hannity, Glenn Beck and that perky blond on Foxs.

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24chester January 29, 2015 at 2:35 am

The silly half-term Governor, a/k/a the Witch of Wasilla, looked and sounded to me like someone on too many prescription meds, with some booze thrown in for good measure. Could be an even bigger clown than Donald Trump if she decides to hop into the 2016 Republican clown car. One can only hope!

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DesertSun59 January 29, 2015 at 12:16 pm

Every time she opens her mouth she proves she’s a fuçkwit.

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Tim Fuhrmann February 2, 2015 at 10:02 am

Perhaps some day soon, the people will come to recognize the left / right paradigm is an artificial construct, specifically designed by the powers that be to keep us squabbling amongst ourselves while they rape and pillage with impunity.

If you doubt this, all you have to do is look at the last five or six presidents and their actions. Each one, regardless of their “side of the aisle” has brought us inexorably closer to a totalitarian government. Obama, the purported “constitutional scholar” gave me some hope for about fifteen minutes. Until he filled his cabinet with bankers. And then, instead of repealing the totalitarian map, the unconstitutional “Patriot Act,” he proceeded to extend and enhance it.

Until the people recognize this trend en masse and move to stop it, totalitarianism is where we are headed.

Unfortunately, I doubt America can be pulled away from its tailgating, ballgames and reality shows long enough to figure out they are chattel. Quite frankly, it saddens me to no end, to be awake in a sleeping world.

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