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Not-So-Holy Roller Smuggles Pot Into Jail … Using A Bible

“GOOD BOOK” SPREADS MORE THAN GOOD NEWS … || By FITSNEWS || There’s nothing in the Bible that says you can’t smoke pot. In fact, God put marijuana on the earth … for us to consume.  And you won’t find a website as critical of government’s failed “War on Drugs”…

“GOOD BOOK” SPREADS MORE THAN GOOD NEWS …

|| By FITSNEWS || There’s nothing in the Bible that says you can’t smoke pot. In fact, God put marijuana on the earth … for us to consume.  And you won’t find a website as critical of government’s failed “War on Drugs” (or the aggressive tactics used in its prosecution) as this one.

Having said all that, there’s a story out of Union County, S.C. that must be told …

Earlier this month, Monkia Marie Ryans – a 24-year-old native of Jonesville, S.C.  – was arrested and charged with attempting to smuggle contraband into the Union County (S.C.) jail.

What did she do?

According to the Union County Sheriff’s Office, Ryans attempted to smuggle tobacco, rolling paper and three marijuana cigarettes (a.k.a. “joints”) into the jail by hiding them in the spine of a book.

Which book?  The Bible …

From The Union Daily Times …

Sheriff David Taylor said Ryans had brought a Bible to the jail around 2:25 p.m. Aug. 7, and informed the jail supervisor that she wanted the Bible to be given to an inmate who was serving time. Taylor said the jail supervisor noticed the Bible didn’t look or feel right, so he contacted Captain Robbie Hines who oversees jail operations.

The Bible was taken and x-rayed, and during the x-ray, a green plant material was noticed inside the binding of the Bible.

The jail supervisor opened the bottom binding of the Bible and found loose tobacco, white paper and three marijuana cigarettes inside.

Ha!

Here’s Ryans’ mug shot …

(Click to enlarge)

pot

(Pic via Union County, S.C.)

And here’s a look at her “Good Book …”

(Click to enlarge)

pot 2

(Pic via Union County, S.C.)

***

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27 comments

The Colonel August 12, 2015 at 9:41 am

Seems like an appropriate song for this story….

https://youtu.be/WeYsTmIzjkw?list=RDWeYsTmIzjkw

Reply
Rocky Verdad August 12, 2015 at 10:54 am

Perfect. OK – I’m going to go clean my room now – or – am I?

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shifty henry August 12, 2015 at 9:48 am

I just took my collection of Bibles (including the Mormon, which I stole from a motel in Atlanta) but I couldn’t tell if any one of them “didn’t look or feel right”,

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Jesus warned us about you August 12, 2015 at 9:49 am

Doesn’t Obama say he is a Christian? Doesn’t the FITSNews staff claim to be Christian, too.

So if you want to crucify Christ because someone presented Him falsely, are you not just as guilty as this criminal? Or maybe you and Obama are even worse for lying about who you are and blaspheming in the process.

Reply
Worst Example Of Christ August 12, 2015 at 10:12 am

I think the people who do the most disservice to spreading the word of Christ are you and Flip.

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Judge from admitted God-hater August 12, 2015 at 10:30 am

Attacking people you don’t know, based on your hatred, is not a very good example. So don’t be surprised if no one heeds your dogma.

Reply
Huh August 12, 2015 at 1:33 pm

What in the world are you talking about?

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U R Blind August 12, 2015 at 1:55 pm

You’d never get it, and that should scare you to death, if you have a soul.

Reply
Whatever August 12, 2015 at 3:32 pm

Whatever dude. The above comment simply doesn’t make any sense given the context of the story.

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Bible Thumper August 12, 2015 at 9:57 am

She should’ve rest it first
Luke 8:17 – For there is nothing hidden that will not be disclosed, and nothing concealed that will not be known or brought out into the open.

Reply
euwe max August 12, 2015 at 12:50 pm

King James Bible Genesis 1:29
And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat.

Reply
Toyota Kawaski August 12, 2015 at 4:03 pm

minus the seeds

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9" August 12, 2015 at 10:06 am

Can’t blame a girl for trying

Jail is boring.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nkumhBVPGdg

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Never accountable, RU? August 12, 2015 at 2:43 pm

Yeah, getting cancer from putting toxins in your lungs by smoking dope, should spice it up more than an anal STD from Butt-humping with Bubba.

It all sounds fun, ’til the bill comes due. Then you hold out your hand, and demand we pay for your Stupid Ass liberal debauchery.

You’re a pretty ignorant fuck, aren’t you?

Reply
9" August 12, 2015 at 3:53 pm

Could you talk more about what you like,during? Debauchery is one of my favorite things…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWG2dsXV5HI

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No free ride, not even gays August 12, 2015 at 4:56 pm

Are herpes, AIDS and lung cancer something you get off on, too?….As long as we pay for it?

Reply
9" August 13, 2015 at 7:49 am

I’d rather you pay for escort services from,Mack.Maybe you could save up,and buy me some butt for Xmas

http://www.macksf.com/

vicupstate August 12, 2015 at 10:12 am

Not exactly news, smuggling contraband into prisons is par for the course.

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Fecal Matters August 13, 2015 at 9:59 am

I thought the guards were in charge of smuggling.

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Centrist View August 12, 2015 at 10:26 am

Well, somebody would have gotten caught because it would have smelled to “high” heaven.

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The Colonel August 12, 2015 at 10:56 am

I see what you did there +3

Reply
Rocky Verdad August 12, 2015 at 10:55 am

Now that’s some Holy Spirit.

Reply
TroubleBaby August 13, 2015 at 12:05 am

Who doesn’t like to read the Bible high? It’s like watching the Wizard of Oz while playing Dark Side of the Moon.

Reply
SCBlues August 13, 2015 at 7:14 am

LOL

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euwe max August 12, 2015 at 12:48 pm

The Bible was taken and x-rayed, and during the x-ray, a green plant material was noticed inside the binding of the Bible.

The jail supervisor opened the bottom binding of the Bible and found loose tobacco, white paper and three marijuana cigarettes inside.
———–
full color x-ray… now available at your local backwoods jailhouse.

Reply
euwe max August 13, 2015 at 8:39 am

This is exactly why hallucinogens like LSD and psylocybin are better than pot. You can’t find them in bibles – even with full color x-ray.

You just have to know which verses to eat.

Reply
SYNTwist August 13, 2015 at 8:54 pm

LMAO! That is hilarious and reminds me of Revelations.

Reply

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