COLUMBIA, S.C. (October 10, 2013) – The No. 14/12 South Carolina football team returned to the BluYou must Subscribe or log in to read the rest of this content.
October 11, 2013 Friday Columbia, South Carolina (AP) – An unsteady on his feet Steve Spurrier addressed the media today in a surprise pre-game interview. He was apologizing for the South Carolina Gamecocks’ embarrassing 46-21 loss to SEC rival Arkansas tomorrow.
“I want to apologize to all Gamecock fans in advance,” the seemingly older than usual ol’ ball coach said having difficulty focusing on his thumb. I’m as disappointed as anybody about how the team will play against Arkansas tomorrow. But you can’t look back at this upcoming loss and torture yourself with ‘What ifs?’ You have to move on.” we have big losses waiting for us at Tennessee and Missouri too. We have to concentrate on those.
After some unintelligible mumblings and a swig out of a bottle under the table, Spurrier donned reading glasses and read from a list of shocking statistics from the upcoming game. Spurrier reported that the Razorbacks will rush for 430 yards, pass for another 320, sack the Gamecock quarterback six times, forcing Connor Shaw out again with a dislocated shoulder and leading back-up quarterback Dylan Thomas to commit an additional four turnovers.
“We have to protect the ball better than we will,” reported Spurrier.
Despite those startling numbers, the statistics will not be all bad for South Carolina.
“We’ll have three explosive defensive plays and Jadeveon Clowney will get one tackle before leaving the field early in the second quarter due to a dreadlock detachment,” reported Spurrier. “So we’ll feel like we’re getting close in several areas.”
According to Coach Spurrier, his football team’s upcoming lackluster performance against an SEC rival will come as a surprise to the coaching staff.
“Nobody sees it coming,” said Spurrier. “As coaches and players at South Carolina, you go into every game expecting to win. So we’re all going to be shocked tomorrow, when we lose to Arkansas by over double our score.”
3 comments
At half-time Clowney will be holding investment / net worth tutorials for the senatorial candidates (and FITS).
October 11, 2013 Friday Columbia, South Carolina (AP) – An unsteady on his feet Steve Spurrier addressed the media today in a surprise pre-game interview. He was apologizing for the South Carolina Gamecocks’ embarrassing 46-21 loss to SEC rival Arkansas tomorrow.
“I want to apologize to all Gamecock fans in advance,” the seemingly older than usual ol’ ball coach said having difficulty focusing on his thumb. I’m as disappointed as anybody about how the team will play against Arkansas tomorrow. But you can’t look back at this upcoming loss and torture yourself with ‘What ifs?’ You have to move on.” we have big losses waiting for us at Tennessee and Missouri too. We have to concentrate on those.
After some unintelligible mumblings and a swig out of a bottle under the table, Spurrier donned reading glasses and read from a list of shocking statistics from the upcoming game. Spurrier reported that the Razorbacks will rush for 430 yards, pass for another 320, sack the Gamecock quarterback six times, forcing Connor Shaw out again with a dislocated shoulder and leading back-up quarterback Dylan Thomas to commit an additional four turnovers.
“We have to protect the ball better than we will,” reported Spurrier.
Despite those startling numbers, the statistics will not be all bad for South Carolina.
“We’ll have three explosive defensive plays and Jadeveon Clowney will get one tackle before leaving the field early in the second quarter due to a dreadlock detachment,” reported Spurrier. “So we’ll feel like we’re getting close in several areas.”
According to Coach Spurrier, his football team’s upcoming lackluster performance against an SEC rival will come as a surprise to the coaching staff.
“Nobody sees it coming,” said Spurrier. “As coaches and players at South Carolina, you go into every game expecting to win. So we’re all going to be shocked tomorrow, when we lose to Arkansas by over double our score.”
Lol. Nice call.