SC

CPD Irony

Because it is such a well-oiled machine, the City of Columbia, S.C. police department (CPD) is hosting a leadership training seminar this fall aimed at teaching “performance and accountability” to law enforcement personnel from across the state. For the bargain basement price of $240, the seminar promises to teach cops…

Because it is such a well-oiled machine, the City of Columbia, S.C. police department (CPD) is hosting a leadership training seminar this fall aimed at teaching “performance and accountability” to law enforcement personnel from across the state.

For the bargain basement price of $240, the seminar promises to teach cops how to:

  • Understand and avoid the seven supervisory behaviors that de-motivate good employees
  • Speak and write the language of performance
  • Clearly communicate your expectations and provide feedback about performance
  • Effectively document performance and write objective, meaningful performance evaluations
  • Appropriately establish and assert your authority without challenging employees
  • Appropriately confront difficult and resistant employees without losing
  • Recognize and handle the manipulations commonly used on supervisors

Hmmmmm …

All of that sounds well and good, but based on the way things are going with the CPD lately, we’d recommend saving your $240.

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18 comments

Frank Pytel July 30, 2013 at 12:10 pm

Is this for real FITS?

Reply
Finius Nullis July 30, 2013 at 6:30 pm

Is this for real (see FP) – no picture — ???

Reply
Frank Pytel July 30, 2013 at 12:10 pm

Is this for real FITS?

Reply
Finius Nullis July 30, 2013 at 6:30 pm

Is this for real (see FP) – no picture — ???

Reply
justathought July 30, 2013 at 4:09 pm

Sign up FITS!

Reply
justathought July 30, 2013 at 4:09 pm

Sign up FITS!

Reply
Honkey Whitebread July 30, 2013 at 5:18 pm

You failed to mention that former Capt. Randy will be doing a few sessions in the seminar.

They will be:

1. How to score dope on the down low from the evidence locker, or preferably your subordinates via perp shakedowns.

2. How to use dope to lure college co-eds into your love nest on the down low.

3. The elements of plausible deniability in situations under which control has been lost.

There will be side bars for extenuating circumstances, including:

A. How to protect yourself under session 3 scenarios above by potentially implicating your colleagues and cohorts.

B. Use of your authority under session 2 to intimidate potential witnesses

Crackers will be served during the sessions, but we’ll tell them what to do under the guise of “public service”.(pun intended)

Reply
lindsey g July 31, 2013 at 10:43 am

Funny stuff.

Reply
Finius Nullis July 31, 2013 at 1:25 pm

“white crackers” – ?

Reply
Honkey Whitebread July 31, 2013 at 2:07 pm

Of course, are there any other kind?

Reply
Honkey Whitebread July 30, 2013 at 5:18 pm

You failed to mention that former Capt. Randy will be doing a few sessions in the seminar.

They will be:

1. How to score dope on the down low from the evidence locker, or preferably your subordinates via perp shakedowns.

2. How to use dope to lure college co-eds into your love nest on the down low.

3. The elements of plausible deniability in situations under which control has been lost.

There will be side bars for extenuating circumstances, including:

A. How to protect yourself under session 3 scenarios above by potentially implicating your colleagues and cohorts.

B. Use of your authority under session 2 to intimidate potential witnesses

Crackers will be served during the sessions, but we’ll tell them what to do under the guise of “public service”.(pun intended)

Reply
lindsey g July 31, 2013 at 10:43 am

Funny stuff.

Reply
Finius Nullis July 31, 2013 at 1:25 pm

“white crackers” – ?

Reply
Honkey Whitebread July 31, 2013 at 2:07 pm

Of course, are there any other kind?

Reply
nitrat July 30, 2013 at 6:47 pm

I have never heard of any agency or business making employees pay for required training.
I think FITSNEWS is confused…again.

Reply
Sam July 31, 2013 at 10:44 am

Wonder whose pocket(s) the fees will find?

Reply
nitrat July 30, 2013 at 6:47 pm

I have never heard of any agency or business making employees pay for required training.
I think FITSNEWS is confused…again.

Reply
Sam July 31, 2013 at 10:44 am

Wonder whose pocket(s) the fees will find?

Reply

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