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POLITICS

Prioleau Alexander: We’re Back, Baby

Common sense is back…

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Man, I knew Donald Trump was going to melt a few million snowflakes after he was sworn in, but what I’m seeing is next level stuff. Of course it’s gonna get worse for Libtards – really bad. Like, walking into the Taco Bell bathroom after Michael Moore’s just been in there, unburdening himself of what he’s done to the dollar menu… that level bad.

Over the past four years, we’ve eaten the Left’s gangrenous elephant, but because it was done one bite at a time, the small doses of the festering meat didn’t kill us. It just seemed like, well, rotting pachyderm was the only thing on the menu.

Yesterday, today, and forever.

The fight, it seemed, was over… but then, 10 million Democrat voters simply vanished. Poof, like Keyser Söze. Where they went, no one knows. It’s almost like they never existed. And without those 10 million magical votes, Trump put a curb-stomping on Kamala Harris.

Now that Trump has reentered the White House and launched his first volley of executive orders, we are getting to see all of the vomitous bile we’ve eaten all piled in one place. It is a naked look at the evil agenda backed by Democrats.

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THE BORDER...

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During Joe Biden‘s tenure, somewhere along the order of 12,000,000 illegals have entered the United States – some were even pro-actively flown here on your dime. While I’m sure most are fine folks seeking a better life, there are still 12,000,000 of them. In any group that size, at least 0.5% of them are going to be either terrorists, criminals, rapists, murderers or serial killers. Hell, you could take 12,000,000 Morman Elders, and you’d end up with the same thing.

Based on those numbers and percentages, there are now at least 60,000 criminals here that we didn’t have four years ago. Sorry, fine folks seeking a better life – but 60,000 bad apples spoil the whole barrel, so everyone has got to go. What if you don’t look or act like a criminal? Well, Ted Bundy sure didn’t look like a psychopath, and Jeffrey Dahmer held down a regular job while snacking on his boytoys.

Obviously, it will be impossible to deport all the illegal aliens, but let’s say we get half of them. According to Newsweek, it costs every single American approximately $950 in taxes per year to support illegal aliens. I, for one, wouldn’t mind my share of that dropping to $475. Oh, and that $950 is based on illegal aliens paying taxes as well—I’ll leave it to you to decide if they do.

So, our southern border is now as watertight as a frog’s ass. Wait, I mean the lanes inbound to the United States are watertight. The ones outbound for Mexico are fixin’ to get busier than an orthodontist offering free braces in London.

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THE ECONOMY…

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Some of your favorite little fishies and creepy crawlies are doomed. Not as doomed as, say, an endangered raptor getting atomized by a clean energy wind turbine… but pretty doomed.

That’s because many of the brainless half-baked regulations that protect them will soon be gone.

Oh, the horror! Those poor creatures! What next, acid rain? A new Ice Age? And what if one of them holds the secret to curing a deadly virus with a 99.9% survival rate?

Shut up.

You know who doesn’t care about the well-being of the Delta Smelt? The guy who picks up your garbage. The cashier at the Zippy Mart. The people who, unlike you, aren’t rich, and need to pay off their 27% car title loans. To save up an emergency fund of $1,000, which the average American family doesn’t have.

Here’s one type of regulation headed for the trash heap of historically bad ideas, which will help the economy immediately: All the bullcrap “climate policies” that drive up the cost of everything. Yes, I know – you haven’t bothered to read a price tag since the last time you were in Saks, but for a single mom with two kids, those price tags might as well be the size of your Range Rover. It’s right up in her grill, every single time she walks into a grocery store. 

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Then, the economic big one. The one you hate the most. The one that will drown the Polar Bear cubs and make the weather continue to change like it has since Genesis: Big Oil.

I don’t think liberals understand how big Big Oil is. If Big Pharma vanished tomorrow, sick people would die. If Big Oil vanished, everyone would die.

I’d die for sure if I thought I’d never again get to drive my ’84 Blazer that gets 6-gallons to the mile.

Big Oil doesn’t just fuel the engines and turbines that run our world – its by-products are in everything. Batteries, inks, fabrics adhesives, prescription drugs, clothing, detergents, medical equipment and about 10,000 other consumer products. If you removed everything that used petroleum products from of your electric car, you’d be sitting on a part of a battery. And it would be pretty hard for an Uber Eats driver sitting on a part of a battery to deliver your avocado toast. 

There’s a 23,000,000 acre tract in Alaska called the National Petroleum Preserve, which is the size of South Carolina. Sounds like a good place to drill for oil – if you actually want poor people to be able to afford gas. Biden made drilling there illegal. What kind of sick, evil human dung-heap does that when the average American is buying groceries on a credit card?

The story has a happy ending, though. Kamala Harris lost, liberalism is dead, and Trump just restored the oil and gas lease on 13,000,000 acres of it. Given the size, I’m pretty sure they can drill a few thousand wells without wiping out too many species you’ve never heard of.

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ELECTRIC VEHICLES…

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One of Biden’s most purposefully destructive mandates was that half of the cars sold in the US had to be zero-emissions by 2030. I can think of no motivation; other than the reality he hates middle-class America.

2030 is five years away, and EV technology is still a joke. There are virtually no charging stations (unless the taxpayer subsidized them). The cars have a 300-mile range, at best. Charging takes hours. If the battery system wears out, the car is basically totaled. The only reason to own an EV is if you want a golf cart with heat and air… or if you want a place to put an “Arms Are For Hugging” bumper-sticker.

Either way, you damn sure aren’t helping to end “global warming.”

Yet Joe Biden wanted to force the American automotive industry to reinvent itself for a technology that’s actually about one-third of the way through the R&D phase.

Story has a happy ending though. President Trump just gutted the entire stupid mess…

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GLOBAL WARMING…

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If I had to guess, I’d bet Trump will use the statistic below to show how ridiculous the Paris Climate Accords are, and how pointless it is to attempt and reach zero-emissions:

Exhibit A: There is no governed place on earth that’s more hysterical about the environment than California. They were sniveling over global warming even before Al Gore produced this docu-comedy about the topic. From 2004 to 2020, Cali’s unwavering commitment to save the Polar Bears resulted in the reduction of 65 million metric tons of carbon dioxide output.

Exhibit B: On the graph in front of you, you’ll see that in 2022, California wildfires pumped 127 million metric tons for carbon dioxide into their atmosphere, ergo cancelling 18 years of stupidity… times two.

“Gee, Prioleau—what’s your solution??? Should we just give up?”

“Yes.”

“That’s outrageous! Why would you say that???”

“Because Mother Nature is undefeated. In everything. Since time began.”

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DOGE… 

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Of all the Trump orders the commies are crying about, this one is the funniest.

Imagine being so Trumpily-deranged you don’t want government to run more efficiently. Seriously, what kind of mentally deviant Bozo wants waste, fraud, and abuse? 

Trump: We’re going to reduce red tape:

Bozos: Nooo! Red tape is good!

Trump: When one person can do three people’s jobs, we’re going to fire two.

Bozos: Nooo! People living on the government teat doing one-third of a job is good.

Trump: We’re going to taking a hard look at the Department of Education, and we’re going to root out the cancer that makes it so inefficient and useless.

Bozos: Nooo! We can’t redirect money directly to schools. Poor kids graduating illiterate is good!

Trump: Pete Hegseth is gonna go into the Pentagon like a wrecking ball, and find out why the hell they keep failing their financial audits.

Bozos: Nooo! Wait… it’s defense dollars…so… Yea!!! Nooo and yea? Crap. Someone, help me here. 

I was on X yesterday, and some moron wrote: Trump is calling all federal employees back to in-office. What an idiot! Thousands of us will quit! 

The guy under that post wrote: I already voted for Trump. You don’t need to oversell him.

It truly does boggle the mind: Only 6% of the federal employees in the D.C. swamp have worked in their offices since being sent home for Covid. I can understand one of them wanting to do one-third of a person’s job from home… but how can someone not getting that deal fight on their behalf? Who are these people?

“Last year I paid $35,000 in federal income taxes alone, and I want all $35k to pay for some entitled lazy bureaucrat to stay at home and chill. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to get back to my job in the freaking oilfield so I can support that person!”

In closing the DOGE topic, let me remark on the unmitigated joy I feel that Elon Musk oversees this. He bought Twitter, walked around for a few days, and asked the horrifically pertinent question, “What is it you’d say… you do around here?”

He fired EIGHTY percent of the private sector employees, and Twitter carried on without a hiccup. Wait until he gets a load of the lard in the public sector.

Anyone wondering if government spending is truly out of control, consider dozens of news outlets, Left and Right, are now reporting the State Department just halted $50,000,000 expenditure earmarked for “condom distribution in Gaza.”

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DEI…

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The entire concept behind DEI is that “equal opportunity” is not enough. A person must not be judged on the content of their character, or the skills they bring to the table… the most important aspects of selecting an employee is their color, religion, and preference in sexual friction.

This concept goes back to one of the BLM books written by some idiot. His theory is “you can only make amends for past injustices with current injustices.”

The thing that’s so hilarious is the endless stream of black men and women who are sounding off on social media and celebrating the end of DEI. Why would that be? Because tens of millions of black Americans have earned their place and success in the world, and they’re tired of people looking at them and asking, “I wonder if they’re a DEI hire?”

Wanna know who one of the worst offenders of DEI is? The airlines. That’s right – the people who put you in a metal tube and fly at 500 knots five miles above the earth. If you get on a plane and pilots aren’t white men, there’s a good chance they were a DEI hire. 

Is that racist? No… it’s math: 92% of military pilots are men, and 86% of those are white. And the military is the only place airlines should recruit from.

Here’s what every human wants in a pilot: A smart as hell, ridiculously experienced professional, who’s been judged in a color/sex-blind way and proven themselves to be better than every other candidate vying for that job. Everyone wants that. Every carbon-based human. No one gives a shit about their race, creed, color, religion, or sexual orientation (provided they aren’t a mentally ill transgender person). 

And yet, these airlines care so much about DEI, they’re willing to kill you in the name of it.

There’s nothing you can do about DEI in a civilian cockpit… but Trump did something about it in the federal government. And thanks to him, you can be fairly confident every new federal employee you encounter earned their job, based on the content of their character and skills they bring to the table.

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IT’S ALL TOO MUCH…

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The sheer tonnage of ass Trump has kicked thus far is breathtaking.

The Left is already writing furious posts about how he’s taking the specific steps needed to turn America into an oligarchical fascist state.

Here’s my advice: Chill.

Pace yourselves…

After all, it’s only been a week.

It’s gonna get much worse, snowflakes…

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR …

Prioleau Alexander is a freelance writer, focusing mostly on politics and non-fiction humor. He is the author of four books: ‘You Want Fries With That?,’ ‘Dispatches Along the Way,’ ‘Where Have All The Cowboys Gone?‘ and ‘They Don’t Call It The Submission Process For Nothing.’ 

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6 comments

Jack January 30, 2025 at 4:28 pm

“And thanks to him, you can be fairly confident every new federal employee you encounter earned their job, based on the content of their character and skills they bring to the table.”

That has to be the funniest thing I have heard in a long time. I really got a belly laugh out of that. From the wife beating alcoholic Fox Anchor running the Pentagon; to the drug-damaged Kennedy who thinks a worm ate his brain, to the neo-nazi billionaire who bought Twitter and cut its value in half and whose car company is down about 35% over the last two years, to the top dog himself, who has bankrupted multiple businesses, including a casino business, and who had to retract his own EO shutting down large swaths of the government, because he and the people who wrote that EO had no clue what they were doing, no one is ever going to accuse this President of letting merit get in the way of advancing a good boot licker. The only skill you need to work in the Trump administration is the ability to make it pleasurable when you kiss his ass. and a willingness to pledge you would kill Americans if he asked you to.

You should apply for a job. You have no integrity and worship Trump. That should be all you need.

Reply
Frank January 30, 2025 at 6:05 pm

I guess you could say Hegseth and Kennedy are Trump’s first DUI hires.

Reply
Joshua Kendrick Top fan January 31, 2025 at 11:37 am

Your writing is nonsensical. Which is good, because your message is so stupid the weirdly incompetent writing keeps it confined to this blog.

Reply
Tom January 31, 2025 at 6:32 pm

Trump has already done more to end meritocracy than any president in modern history. He is gutting our civil service system, which was put into place decades ago to ensure that federal jobs go to qualified people and not political hacks, as had been the practice for most of the nation’s history. Trump, identifies hard-working nonpartisan civil servants as ‘deep state’ moles who will not rubber stamp his personal goals and who need to be purged in favor of his political hacks who will do whatever he tells them to do even if it is illegal or unconstitutional. He refuses to ask his appointees to sign an ethics pledge because he is not interested in ethical people. The goal of Trump’s administration seems to be to staff or government with individuals who will stand behind Trump if and when he violates the laws, and the Constitution or when he goes after innocent people who oppose him. He wants people who are as cruel, immoral, and as greedy as he is.

Reply
River Top fan January 31, 2025 at 10:50 pm

President Trump is doing a great job.

Reply
Jack February 2, 2025 at 5:34 pm

Bullshit!

Reply

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