By TAYLOR BROWN || So, when signing on to write for the infamous FITSNews, I was told “it would be nice to have a ‘Republican,’” so, now, here I am, the token Conservative Republican, who uses commas like a foreigner.
I like to think I was asked to write for my intellectual brilliance and political insight; however, it was probably my Twitter picture (@TaylahhKane) and my snarky Ebola tweets that did it (I’m still ready to use #EbolaInCola).
My background in politics goes back pretty far – back to elementary school, actually, when I did a commercial for Governor Jim Hodges … which remains one of my most embarrassing moments in the political world. Since then, I have religiously followed elections and the news, and I am very proud to say that I would now NOT appear in a commercial for Hodges.
My platform: Abortion (the most important social issue to me)? Pro-life. Who is possibly more in need of rights than those who make up our humanity? Who possibly needs greater protection than those who are incapable of speaking or standing up for their rights themselves? Life is the first freedom – the first right from with the rest of our liberties flow, and is, thus, the most sacred.
Gay marriage? Get the government out of marriage entirely. Leave it up to the church. Death penalty? I once wrote an essay called “An Eye for an Eye: Why Criminals Should Die,” which, I think, speaks for itself.
Guns? The bigger, the better. Government? The smaller, the better. Favorite rapper? Nas. Raising taxes? Just don’t. Taxes in general? Flat tax. Capitalism? Love it. Welfare? Reform and privatize most of it.
Favorite person in the Senate? Tim Scott. Favorite person in the House? Trey Gowdy. Favorite person in SCOTUS? Clarence Thomas. Favorite person in the White House? HAHAHA.
Universal healthcare? HELL NO. NSA? Dangerous and slippery slope. ISIS? Evil. Favorite song? 1812 Overture. Favorite sport? Is there any sport other than Gamecock football? Political heroes? The Iron Lady and Lee Atwater. My best political experience? Herman Cain once sang to me.
So here I am, love me or hate me, I don’t much care.
Taylor Brown is a 20-something Wofford College graduate who somehow got sucked into politics at an early age. She is easily won over with Rush’s fast food, wine, and spirited political arguments.