WITHOUT BEING TACKLED, TASED OR FROZEN TO DEATH …
|| By FITSNEWS || We momentarily thought we’d lost her, but our intrepid “Republican” columnist Taylor Brown has apparently surviving the big storm up in Washington, D.C. After a thirty-hour layover at Reagan National Airport, Brown is finally winging her way back to the Palmetto State …
Did she have a good trip in our nation’s capital? Apparently so …
“I wanted so desperately to sing ‘Happy Birthday, Mr. President’ while at the White House, but I didn’t wanna be tackled and tased by the Secret Service,” the 24-year-old scribe told us upon leaving 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.
Brown also told us she was glad a Democratic friend signed off on her White House tour request because “I feel like I might have been ‘randomly selected’ for some additional questioning otherwise.”
As for finally getting on board a plane after her thirty-hour ordeal at Reagan National?
“I have never been happier to have a cramped seat and no legroom,” she told us.
Anyway we’re glad Taylor is back safe and sound … and we look forward to her sounding off again very soon. We also look forward to her sharing a few pics with us from her visit.
At least we know she won’t get a chest cold.
har har har
Sounding off? Can’t wait. We need more cliche ridden talking points written with less discernment than a child. Those who can’t write….write for Fitsnews.
No shortage of cliche-ridden talking points and self-important blowhards in the comments section.
is that you Taylor?
Na, just figured if we’re busting chops might as well give everyone a turn.
what u be meaning Willis?
Sort of explains your post doesn’t it…
What Democratic friend would that be?
I’d like to nominate myself to tackle and tickle her.
Hey, thats my modus op. Well, at least the tackle part.
How does it feel being the scum of a guy’s site you consider to be scum?
A week or so ago, several were asking about Taylor in a Bikini.
While we need to disregard her companions in the photos, you may need to click on the resulting sghots to get full view (“click to enlarge”)
I don’t think she could get a chest cold, even if she wanted. Puppies are too warm.
“SHOTS” – sorry, I strangled.
My retinas are burned from the pasty white skin
Yeah, but you looked too.
Hell, I’ll look at anything. I didn’t go hunting them down. That’s just creepy.
I mean if I really wanted to see them, I’d let her show’em to me in more of a private setting.
BOW CHICA-CHICA BOW BOW!!
“I mean if I really wanted to see them, I’d let her show’em to me in more of a private setting.”
My apologies for offending a true gentleman.
“but I didn’t wanna be tackled and tased”
Taylor, since YOU brought it up, I’ll share a story from the St. Patrick’s Day
about eight (?) years ago. The lovely, vibrant girl who guzzled beer faster
than I could buy them asked me to walk her back to her room. We only made it as far as a grassy area, dark and quiet. Well, the magic happened and afterwards she said, “WOW! What the hell, man, I’ve never experienced that
before!” My reply to her was, “Yeah, isn’t this Taser great?”
Here’s a few quickies just for Taylor, the Party Girl —–‘
A five-dollar bill walks into a club. The bartender says, “You’ll have to leave. This is a singles’ bar.”
A skeleton goes into a bar and says, “Give me a beer – and a mop.”
A seal walks into a tavern and the bartender says, “What’ll you have?”
“Anything but a Canadian Club.”
A brain walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Sorry, but I can’t serve you.”
“Why not?” asks the brain.
“You’re already out of your head.”
That’s some hard-hitting journalism right there.
and to think I was going to ax Taylor to Washington in March to attend the National Cattlemen’s Beef Association Legislative Conference. Heifer on my arm and few 1,000 in the field.
I just saw on WIS TV’s site where a woman’s ex boyfriend bit off her nose. Maybe Taylor will write a column advocating for men to have their teeth all pulled out if accused o CDV or if a woman says she’s afraid of him.