Letter: “Baroness Von Nikki”

Dear Editor: South Carolina lost her soul on a lone November night in 2010.  This is the night the Baroness von Nikki Haley won an election marred in controversy by morally disqualifying activities. She achieved her goal of entering the governors mansion, not out of ideas, but out of unmerciful…

Dear Editor:

South Carolina lost her soul on a lone November night in 2010.  This is the night the Baroness von Nikki Haley won an election marred in controversy by morally disqualifying activities.

She achieved her goal of entering the governors mansion, not out of ideas, but out of unmerciful shrewdness.

It was as if one day, Nikki Haley contrived that in order to best the man she for so long blamed for her lack of success in the S.C. House, she must become governess of the south.

Rather than call her baroness Von Nikki Haley, we eloquently call her “the governness.”

She treats her post as if she is ordained by God, and mustn’t be questioned by the laypeople who work tirelessly to survive in an unfathomably ill-tempered economy. She traverses around the state claiming victory over the snarlingly unwashed masses called the Democratic Party with a golden tipped shovel in tow. This shovel can be seen pushing dirt atop the graves of her many detractors.

As if she was a thief in the night, she quickly garbles up the hopes and dreams of Democrat and Republican legislators alike.  To our governness, no new job is created without the tireless efforts of our very own Nikki Haley.  For no one, but Nikki Haley could conceivably bring anything to South Carolina.

All the while, unwashed masses storm the food pantries, and pray for a decent job, she sits atop her throne of rich mahogany picking particles of food out of her teeth with the bones of her vanquished enemies, scoping out her next victim.

Baroness von Nikki Haley in her mind, hasn’t devoured enough hopes and dreams of her electorate — She must now achieve the goal of becoming the most morally bankrupt politician in recent memory.

The governess has concluded that she, herself, must eat the souls of the vanquished.

“Who are these laypeople casting doubt from the shadows of my golden hubris?” Nikki Haley ponders in disbelief as people mistakenly question her authority.

The baronness tires quickly of watchful eyes.  This is the very reason why the governess moves in the dead-of-night.

Like a vengeful harpee she finds weakness, and crushes it with the speed and accuracy of a soaring hawk.

As if replaying a real world scene from the now infamous Netflix series – House of Cards – Baroness von Nikki Haley found an injured Speaker Bobby Harrell.

With a devilish grin, Nikki Haley issued a impromptu statement stating her desire for the Speaker to concede defeat. In the baroness’ eyes, this is the victory she has long awaited.  Bobby Harrell’s mere existence personified rebellion.  Because of this one man — in her eyes, her vetoes against society were overturned.  This cannot be accepted in the world of the governess.  She seeks to crush any sense or individuality, or difference of opinion.

The only people who may enter her chambers must have undying loyalty, and a merriment only contrived from basking in the glory of the governess.

While we, the unwashed masses pray for an end to the hypocrisy of the governess, one thing can be certain — if even the Speaker does not quinch her thirst for vengeance, each and everyone of us could and will be next.

For the governess must bathe in the blood of the innocent.


“Forrest Gimp”


sic speaking

Forrest: Whatever your day job is … don’t quit it.

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Smirks September 24, 2014 at 8:39 am

What the hell am I reading?

WW September 24, 2014 at 8:49 am

A Governor (Haley) straight from the bowels of Hell.

huh? September 24, 2014 at 8:50 am

The sermon from the Ervin ad with the widow?

Dave Chappelle September 24, 2014 at 9:52 am

I know, right? I couldn’t finish.

shifty henry September 24, 2014 at 12:30 pm


Q – Mr. Arbuthnot, as an expert in the use of the cliché,
are you prepared to testify here today regarding its application topics of love, sex, matrimony and the like?

A – I am.

Q – Very good. Now, Mr. Arbuthnot, what’s love?

A – Love is blind.

Q – Good. What does love do?

A – Love makes the world go round.

Q – Whom does a young man fall in love with?

A – With the Only Girl In The World.

Q – They are then said to be?

A – Victims of Cupid’s darts.

Q – And he?

A – Whispers sweet nothings in her ear.

Q – Describe the Only Girl In The World.

A – Her eyes are like stars. Her teeth are like pearls. Her lips are ruby. Her cheek is damask, and her form divine.

Q – Haven’t you forgotten something?

A – Eyes, teeth, lips, cheek, form–no sir, I don’t think so.

Q – Her hair?

A – Oh, certainly. How stupid of me. She has hair
like spun gold.

Q – Very good, Mr. Arbuthnot. Now will you describe the Only Man?

A – He is a blond Viking, a he-man, and a square –shooter who plays the game. There is something about him that rings true, and he has kept himself pure and clean so that when he meets the girl of his choice, the future mother of his children, he can look her in the eye.


Nikki You Know ME September 24, 2014 at 8:48 am

I know Haley well, helped her win her election to the House and then, her election as Governor. For this, I must offer my heart felt apologies to the people of this great State!
Shortly after being sworn in, I found her self serving, it’s all about her attitude to be more than I could accept! She never let the truth stand in her way to tell a lie! I found she has many character flaws and personality disorders. She is immature, unqualified and simply uninterested in any; but , her own advancement.
I was wrong about her. She is a dishonest, self serving, liar, who could care less about this great State and it’s people. She surrounds herself with incompetence and like minded self serving narcissist. It is far less about the State and her people and far more that of her and her contributors, which she worships more than any religion, whether it is Sikh, Hindu, or Christian.
Haley needs to taste defeat, rather than demand we wash her feet. She needs to lose this election, if the State is to win.

get some counseling September 24, 2014 at 8:59 am

Horseshit liar.You have posted this same pathetic fairytale on numerous occasions.What was your job?
What I figured.Ann Romney said in a interview yesterday that Nikki would make a great President.
I will take her word or opinion over a sniveling, bitter loser that apparently holds a grudge because he was asked to take the trash out at campaign headquarters?

Nikki You Know ME September 24, 2014 at 3:54 pm

Sir, you would probably know me too. Your opinion means nothing to me.
You are obviously a koolaid drinker and unable to see the forest for the trees.Your blind loyalty to a looser is the reason we face the illegal, immoral and unethical problems in our Government.
Just like the those who are brain dead and support Obama and his failed Administration, so are those of you who worship at the Haley alter of her failed Administration.
I did not need an appointment, or job. I was at the Capital City Club on election night and at her swearing in, in the House Chamber when she was elected to the House, personally invited by her.
She is a failed Governor and will NOT be treated well by history!
Your opinions and posts are worthless drivel.
Nikki knows me well and so would you.
Evidently, you cannot handle the truth!
She needs to go!

Kuyperdog September 25, 2014 at 12:43 am

Keep writing “Nikki You Know Me”, this conservative knows (as you well do) some things are more important than politics-things like character and duty to state (how deep is the Savannah River at Port now??)

WW September 24, 2014 at 8:38 pm

And every time it’s true!
She is a failure and liar!
She needs to go! And Go! And Go! Until we cannot see or hear her anymore!

mark September 24, 2014 at 11:50 am

Sikh, according to the internet, is the perfect marriage of Hindu and Islam.

HD September 24, 2014 at 8:50 am

“Forrest: Whatever your day job is … don’t quit it.” Good advice from one who made that mistake.

shifty henry September 24, 2014 at 9:09 am

Could be the owner of the Big Butt BBQ Shack….

shifty henry September 24, 2014 at 9:08 am

I can’t really believe that this is a serious message. Looks more like a test to find errors in spelling, grammar, etc. Anybody have a guess?

SC Political Digest September 24, 2014 at 10:28 am

Haley’s Lack of success?

Even the anti-Haley/pro-Sheheen State newspaper admitted Haley has brought in at least 30,000 new jobs, in the most miserable economy since The Great Depression. (see SCPSD.)

While Haley has mildly conceded to the left on education (expansion and 4K) she has pretty much slapped the $#!* out of you liberals on MANY important issues, including Common Core, Obamacare, Charter Schools, and Gas Tax.

South Carolina is in better shape now than when Haley took office. And Sanford operated in the Robust Bush economy most of his terms. She has had to deal the the national disaster of Obama.

This “writer” may have lots of hate, but your ignorance is even more abundant. As far as critical analysis, you look like a Dumb@$$.

PS: this attempt at simile of metaphor is pathetic. You’re really not stating anything that can be supported, except your own un-originality, and inability to critically think.

ThreePalms September 24, 2014 at 10:42 am

Robust Bush economy? What the hell are you talking about? Please review employment numbers for 2006 through 2008. What was so robust that caused the Bush administration to bail out financial institutions with TARP? We experienced a near financial collapse in the ” robust Bush economy”.
Is it any wonder that most people here think you are a complete imbecile? My god, chump, you prove it every day.

Sailor September 24, 2014 at 4:45 pm

Just like a village, every blog must have an idiot. GT is ours!

SC Political Digest September 24, 2014 at 8:14 pm

What happened, a BIG change politically, in 2006? LMAO…You stuck your foot in your mouth w/ that one, didn’t you?

And TARP was a concession to Obama and the Democrats. Obama screwed it up, after promising all would well if it was passed.

You look like a Dumb@$$…it may pay to do a little homework, next time…IDIOT…

PI Guy September 24, 2014 at 10:40 am

What do you expect? She is a f##king gypsy…literally. Just google the history of the gypsy and see they originated in India, only to spread throughout N. America and become thieves and looters.

Guest September 24, 2014 at 10:53 am

I used to think former Governor David Beasley was ignorant, dumb, stupid and incompetent. And then Trikki Nikki was elected Governor, who by far is the worst Governor ever in SC history. Just listening to her redneck syntax, referring to herself in the 3rd person, flailing around still not knowing or understanding what the role of the Governor is, (not to mention day to day Gubernatorial incompetence) certainly makes me reconsider my long ago analysis of The Beaz. He’s a Mensa and roaring success compared to the current mental midget we have as Governor today.

HD September 24, 2014 at 11:38 am

Governor Beasley did what he said he would do. His agencies functioned well. I recall no “scandals” during his time in office. There was remarkable stability in his executive staff, and in his Cabinet. On what facts do you base your comment?

Guest September 24, 2014 at 12:41 pm

I said I had to reconsider my then incorrect analysis, based on comparison of Haley. Not to mention Sanfraud. In retrospect, the Beasley Admin was (as I stated above) “… a roaring success…” Read what you want much? I’d love to have Beasley era competence today, especially as compared to Trikki Nikki. We’ll just let the Wolfe and Rose scandals go at this time.

HD September 24, 2014 at 12:55 pm

You didn’t say that you had reconsidered your view of Governor Beasley on his own merits, only in comparison to Governor Haley. A distinction with a difference i think. You ought to try the former, if you haven’t.

Guest September 24, 2014 at 5:01 pm

Certainly compared to his modern day predecessors, The Beaz was an abject failure, as evidenced by getting spanked by limp-wristed Jim Hodges. The Beaz squandered what we handed off to him. All he had to do was follow the example of the previous eight years. However, The Beaz is far preferable to Trikki Nikki; he was certainly more competent, smarter, better informed, apparently more intellectually capable, more aware of what his role and responsibilities were. I voted for The Beaz for Senator in 2004, ease up. I’d like for him to get back into the mix in SC. Yes Henry, my view of the Beasley Administration improved over time on their own merits, as we saw one Administration after another, post Campbell, fail to move the state forward and as well, poorly Administer the office.

HD September 24, 2014 at 8:38 pm

Governor Beasley lost on account of three positions he took – opposition to video poker (which resulted in millions of dollars being spent against him); opposition to the lottery; and his willingness to remove the battle flag from the dome. I hardly think that any of those positions justifies classifying his term as a failure. You can probably tell that I think his term doesn’t get the credit it deserves. He was a very good Governor.

I am not Henry Deneen (the HD is short for Happy Daddy). I was a senior staffer in Governor Beasley’s administration however. Proof that one can be both biased and correct!

You say “we” handed off… Did you work for Governor Campbell?

Kuyperdog September 25, 2014 at 12:47 am

Jim Hodges was limp wristed, but wallet stuffed with video poker millions!!!

Kuyperdog September 25, 2014 at 12:46 am

Totally agree- Beasley’s was great in many ways! His one fault was the flag issue. But, that did not cost him in ’98- big fat corrupt video poker money cost him that election!

Dianna Von Fellatrice September 24, 2014 at 11:34 am

Oh my friend this is but wasted drivel for the empress who will win re-election easily because the unwashed masses have decided to throw their lot to the GOP. Like lemmings to the sea, they are driven to the party and lady who cares not a fig for them. Only when every South Carolina has been cut by the Republican scalpel will the people come to their senses and vote for moderates. Does anyone dare start a 3rd party in South Carolina? We need one now.

Hollywood Glamour September 24, 2014 at 12:18 pm

People are more interested in her overly bleached white teeth than all the hanky panky she conducts.

shifty henry September 24, 2014 at 12:12 pm

‘lost her soul on a lone November night in 2010’
Wrong – it was on a Spring weekend during her freshman year…

Buz Martin September 24, 2014 at 4:24 pm

Rhetorical overkill much?

Karolyn September 24, 2014 at 6:25 pm


Salty Doggerel September 25, 2014 at 9:33 am

The halls are alive
With the sound of mucus,
Expectorant saliv-
A, and the taint of hubris.
The statehouse is just one
Of a number of Taj Mahals
Where Baroness Nimrata
Swats at political balls
As if they were pinatas.

Dough! ah, dear,
This female’s near!
And not piddly cash to buy hominy.
What would make it oh so clear?
The “enhorsement” of Ann Romney!
So let’s make a state that’s saddled–
With royalists, entitlement-addled,
Yet knee-bent in prostration–
A model for the nation.


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