Random

Vacay: Kahuna Cup

See that wave? I ain’t skeered of it. In fact I’ve ridden bigger – much bigger (that’s what she said). Bodysurfing is an art that’s been perfected for the last three generations in my family … and like Johnny in Vassar Clements’ classic “Devil Went Down To Georgia,” I really…

See that wave?

I ain’t skeered of it. In fact I’ve ridden bigger – much bigger (that’s what she said).

Bodysurfing is an art that’s been perfected for the last three generations in my family … and like Johnny in Vassar Clements’ classic “Devil Went Down To Georgia,” I really am the “best that’s ever been.” I’ve gone out in all conditions – middle of winter, during tropical storms, you name it.

I ride big waves from far out … and I ride them all the way in. And if you think that sounds sexy as hell, you should see me do it.

How committed am I? My wife (the lovely Mrs. Sic Willie) just waxed my back to minimize resistance people. And it didn’t hurt … not even a little.

Reports of especially ferocious riptides in Myrtle Beach this summer? Bring ’em … I ain’t skeered.

When my family and I bodysurf, it’s intensely physical. We push each other to achieve the best position on the wave (a process known as “jockeying”). Then we punch and grab at each other as the wave breaks in an effort to throw off each other’s timing. And as everyone rides into shore, the violence only intensifies.

The only rule? No rules.

We have bizarre rituals in the water to summon mighty waves, and when they arrive we name them – “Big Ivan,” “Big Irving” and “The Widowmaker,” among others. And we ride them with specific objectives in mind – like the eradication of worldwide communism.

Anyway (cue vacation language) even though FITS will be offline during my defense of the global bodysurfing championship (a.k.a. the “Kahuna Cup”), I’ll be keeping a list of the stories that need to be broken/ covered/ commented upon when I return … so please keep sending your tips, links, comments, questions and suggestions via email or use our new Tip Wire if you prefer sending information anonymously.

I’ll be keeping tabs on all of those submissions …

Also, I’ll be randomly updating my Twitter and Facebook pages while I’m gone … so be sure to sign up for my tweets or “friend” me if you haven’t done so already.

And one final note … not long after my return on July 21st we will be unveiling FITS 3.0, the latest iteration of our ongoing experiment in new media. The upgrade – which is being beta-tested as we speak – will represent a major leap forward for us, and I look forward to sharing it with you.

See you guys soon …

***

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37 comments

Thomas July 13, 2013 at 10:45 pm

Enjoy the monsoon.

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Thomas July 13, 2013 at 10:45 pm

Enjoy the monsoon. BTW, not guilty!

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GrandTango July 14, 2013 at 7:43 am

FITS has been Obviously non-committal to the George Zimmerman Kangaroo Court in Fla. …(Is that where Sanford’s people first exploited?)…would explain a lot…

Strange, since it is a cause ALL Liberal-Tarians should be SCREAMING about on Zimmerman’s behalf. A man exercising his Rights was railroaded to a joke a trail w/ a Leftwing Zealot judge, as hate mobs, yelled “Kill Him.”..And then the PEOPLE, through a fair just jury, spoke back…

Then Brave and Just Americans who decided this case risked their own safety to follow the law…and do the right thing..

Truly a MONUMENTAL moment in modern American history…but Liberals lost, so the media is either lashing out ridiculously, or trying to ignore it (see FITS)…

At any rate: Another BIG loss for Obama…and another very telling and high-profile fumble by FITS…

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Thomas July 14, 2013 at 10:30 am

Truly a despicable display of NBC’s manipulation of the 911 call, prosecutorial malfeasance overriding the investigation results and manufacturing a 2nd degree charge, the media talking heads with the experts denouncing the entire defendant team’s right to exist, the disgusting calls for riots if the defendant proves his case, the blatant and unchallenged threats against the defendant’s life, and the judge, when she made up a charge of manslaughter against the defendant as well as interrogating the defendant in open court against his right to be silent during the proceeding by overruling his attorney representation twice ordering him to answer her questions. Is there any such thing even resembling a fair trial in America? If so, where?

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GrandTango July 14, 2013 at 11:16 am

Thomas proves this site is good for something. I likely would not have been able to read Thomas’ insightful and CORRECT characterization, if he did not post it on FITS…

A couple of FITS’ visitors, like Thomas, are so much more intelligent, articulate and GET IT…more than FITS ever will…

Good post Thomas. And thanks for demonstrating there are more good people out there…Not just the Radical NAZI types, that infest FITS site, because he feeds them his waffles….

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Nölff July 17, 2013 at 11:37 am

It looks like you two guys hit it off. Too bad you can’t get married.

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GrandTango July 17, 2013 at 11:44 am

I can marry anybody I want. I just don’t have to FORCE the government to condone it, like you hateful, Bigots do…
Sexual Preference is NOT a civil right…and I’m not some greedy gov’t check-gobbler…like you….

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Makng Babies July 17, 2013 at 12:39 pm

“Sexual Preference is NOT a civil right”

So the government doesn’t need to condone a straight couple either.

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GrandTango July 17, 2013 at 2:17 pm

God condoned my marriage because I asked him to. And I thank God for a very wonderful and fruitful marriage. I don’t need your approval or intrest.
And i’m perfectly OK to let your church, or your gods, or whatever you worship, condone yours…and STFU…

This Guy July 17, 2013 at 3:26 pm

Could ya ask God what the fuck was he thinking when put an asshole troll on this blog?

GrandTango July 17, 2013 at 4:25 pm

I’ve learned not to question God. There are a lot of things happening in this country that I cannot understand. If I could change them I would and I’ll work toward that goal,

And I do pray that this divided nation is healed from the vengeful, hate-filled and ignorance that we see on display, high-profile, daily….

Other than that, I’ve been wildly blessed compared to where I came from. For that I’m very thankful to God. And I am sad for those too arrogant and spiritually ill to accept the great things God has for those who follow Him…

ANTiSEEN July 18, 2013 at 10:58 am

My god can beat up your god
your god can suck on my rod

GrandTango July 18, 2013 at 12:22 pm

My God, w/ President Lincoln, freed the slaves the democrats held…,Sadly, your god has your poor, immoral soul in ignorance and bondage.

ANTiSEEN July 18, 2013 at 2:04 pm

You mean your god that allowed the enslavement of men, killing of Native Americans, the Holocaust…? Seems like a mean son of a bitch to me. No wonder his believers are scared as little kids.

GrandTango July 18, 2013 at 2:13 pm

You, as a hateful, anti-Christian Bigot serve the Devil. And Hitler is of the Devil…You are him…I do sincerely pray for the lost, as you are. I really would rejoice to see you turn your life around and free yourself from your bondage.

That said: God allows free will. Just as we are free to elect Obama…but we suffer the consequences when we turn from God and allow power for vengeful, bitter and hatful leaders…

But God also empowered the US, as a Christian Nation to defeat your god Hitler. We we turned to God again. We are at a crisis, that’s just getting worse….. The wages of sin are DEATH…So we must be vigilant… And I pray He will help extricate us from the hideous mess Obama has us in…..

ANTiSEEN July 18, 2013 at 2:23 pm

Lol. I see the Holocaust as one of the most brutal things humanity has ever witnessed. So, no, I’m not Hitler. Damn, you’re really blnded by that light, huh?

Privacy Settings July 18, 2013 at 2:44 pm

He thinks he’s fighting the good fight, Anti, but he doesn’t know he’s advocating hate all day long.

GrandTango July 18, 2013 at 3:08 pm

Obama told you to vote for ‘REVENGE.’ He is a hateful man who racistly insulted the grandmother who raised him. You worship Obama and all the backwards thinking he represents.., regardless of how much suffering, failure and bitterness he breeds…

Vengence is Mine, says the Lord…and the Lord is ALWAYS right…or you would not have the freedom we give you, to bash Him…

Privacy Settings July 18, 2013 at 3:51 pm

Hahaha! I didn’t vote. Obama, Dems, Republicans, Beck, Bunch of sociopaths. Religion=Bullshit! You are being used like a tool.

GrandTango July 18, 2013 at 3:58 pm

You don’t have have to vote. Just like the Devil and Hitler, Obama loves people like you. Too ignorant to care about doing right. And easily led by the pop-culture immoral…

C.A.S.H July 18, 2013 at 5:09 pm

Big bisiness is the god of this country, GT. Too bad I don’t have the cold heart of The 700 Club or TBN to take your god fearing money.

9" July 18, 2013 at 8:25 am

You don’t have to marry me,as long as you’ll keep gobbling my cock,BUT,you need to work on your,GAG REFLEX,instead of vomiting while you deep-throat the fucking thing,bitch.

YOUR BUTT IS VERY GREEDY,and you just can’t get enough.

The truth will set you FREEEEEEEEE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=io2erj8GhFc

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Big Lotts® July 16, 2013 at 3:58 pm

Shit! anybody want to talk about the CPD or SLED? Momma’s shaved pussy?

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Big Lotts® July 17, 2013 at 12:46 pm

We all know about your momma’s shaved pussy, but does anyone find it funny Santiago, Wilson and the mayor went to the cleaners to bail out Mr. NCAAP with a field ticket? Wonder if they were “gettng their stories straight?

Reply
Big Lotts® July 16, 2013 at 3:58 pm

Shit! anybody want to talk about the CPD or SLED? Momma’s shaved pussy?

Reply
Big Lotts® July 17, 2013 at 12:46 pm

We all know about your momma’s shaved pussy, but does anyone find it funny Santiago, Wilson and the mayor went to the cleaners to bail out Mr. NCAAP with a field ticket? Wonder if they were “gettng their stories straight?

Reply

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