Her Excellency The Honorable Nikki Haley …

“SHE’S ONLY SEVENTEEN …” || By FITSNEWS || Paintings of modern day politicians have always struck us as awkward.  Seriously, didn’t the whole “let’s paint our leaders” thing go out of style right around the time the head of Citizen Louis Capet (a.k.a. Louis XVI) landed in a basket in…


|| By FITSNEWS || Paintings of modern day politicians have always struck us as awkward.  Seriously, didn’t the whole “let’s paint our leaders” thing go out of style right around the time the head of Citizen Louis Capet (a.k.a. Louis XVI) landed in a basket in the Place de la Concorde in Paris in 1783?

Because we would have taken that as a sign …

Anyway … here we have an an oil-on-linen portrait of S.C. governor Nikki Haley, painted by artist John Seibels Walker.

The painting – which is making the rounds among members of the Republican National Committee – features Haley standing in the drawing room of the South Carolina governor’s mansion.

“To me, the artist has made her look about seventeen,” one source told FITS.

Of interest?  Haley is sporting the same suit she wore during her address to the 2012 Republican National Convention … a prime time speaking slot she secured via the infamous “Savannah River Sellout.”

Oh well … Haley’s shameless betrayal of our state’s economic interests never became an issue during her 2014 reelection campaign (a race she won handily – at least among those who showed up).

“Let them eat cake,” in other words.

Literally …


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jimlewisowb January 13, 2015 at 2:33 pm

C’Mon skippy – publish the full picture

Everyone needs to see her Freddy Krueger hand

Becha a pitcher of ying ling, order of calabash wings/curly fries that the first portrait never hangs on a wall

Don't quote shitty bands dick January 13, 2015 at 2:55 pm

Freddy Krueger hand!

Ha! Very well done. If the painting showed her hands I think the other has a dildo in it, or she’s fingering herself.

mamatiger92 January 13, 2015 at 2:33 pm

Nice hairdo.
Is it just me, or does her head look really pointy?

Nölff January 13, 2015 at 3:07 pm

It does look like a conehead.

Hannah January 13, 2015 at 2:36 pm

Dear god….she thinks she is the states own Dear Leader like Kim Jong Un. South Carolina thanks four more years of this crazy witch.

Glyde January 13, 2015 at 2:39 pm

You are so right…she just issued an order all state employees face termination if they dont answer the phone how great she is…..what a nutjob.

bb January 13, 2015 at 2:49 pm

Amen again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Look what 4 more of Obama did for (to) us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We’re screwed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Obama and Ohaley, truly screwed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Torch January 13, 2015 at 2:40 pm

Looks like the artist took the hook out of her nose.

Former Haley Suporter January 13, 2015 at 2:47 pm

Seriously airbrushed!!!!

Your Fault January 13, 2015 at 2:41 pm

Everybody bitches about Haley, yet you all allowed her to be elected again. Save the whining, nobody cares.

WW January 13, 2015 at 2:46 pm

Haley and Obama!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Freddie January 13, 2015 at 2:42 pm

Suck it voters she answers to nobody now…lawmakers better play nice with her she will veto your shit cowards.

Sammy January 13, 2015 at 2:45 pm

Haley: You tell the artist he better paint me thin and take those goddamn crows feet out or I will release hounds.

Dave Chappelle I'm Rick James January 13, 2015 at 2:46 pm

What is really pathetic is that this “mystical” portrait is “making its rounds.”

I mean seriously, stop for a second and just think about how ridiculous it is that certain people are sharing and passing around a large oil painting of a politician.

I can’t believe that those who are in this circle as the portrait “makes its rounds” don’t actually feel really stupid for taking part.

Tired and Retired January 13, 2015 at 4:16 pm

If you really want indigestion, you should read some of the comments of some of the RNC members, I only wish we had a governor as good as they people are saying she is!

Jackasses worshiping jackals January 13, 2015 at 4:40 pm

Pol worship surrounds us….Jake Knotts has a bridge named after him and James Mett’s has a building. Both are criminals.

Mike at the Beach January 13, 2015 at 6:18 pm

They’re taking Metts’ name off of “his” old building! That may piss him off as much as a 12-month pull in federal prison.

Bonnie January 13, 2015 at 8:10 pm

What Bullshit!
Frazier has a brothel named for him!
The new insane asylum is going to be named for Eckstrom!
The sewage treatment plant in Charleston for Sanford.
North Charleston cesspool for Harrell.
A public porta john in lexington for Bob Peeler.
A daycare in the heart of cocain country South America for Ravenel.
Our infamous Republicans!

Daryl55 January 13, 2015 at 2:47 pm

By executive order all familes must place this photo in their home and bow twice daily to the Dear Leader or face prison camps.

WW January 13, 2015 at 2:52 pm

State employees will be ordered to answer the phone, “Hail to the Queen, her Majesty Haley”!!!

you bought it... January 13, 2015 at 6:00 pm

All SC families, maybe. She’s of no importance to anybody else.

Nölff January 13, 2015 at 2:48 pm

… very narcissistic looking. It’s like a person on Facebook who goes overboard with selfies.

shifty henry January 14, 2015 at 10:18 am

Nikki has a little skirt with splits right up the sides,
and everywhere that Mary goes the boys can see her thighs.

Nikki has another skirt with a split right up the front …..

(but she doesn’t wear that one too often!)

Don't quote shitty bands dick January 13, 2015 at 2:52 pm

Seriously, did you just quote Winger song? Holy shit that sucks balls!

You could have gone one tiny step up by quoting the Warrant song “She’s my cherry pie” and at least have been more on point given your history.


Flip Wilson January 13, 2015 at 2:52 pm Reply
bamberger January 13, 2015 at 3:31 pm

At least the artist made her look thin with good skin.

Inaccurate representation January 13, 2015 at 3:46 pm

Haley doesn’t comb her damn hair. This is inaccurate.

Manray9 January 13, 2015 at 3:50 pm

Here’s a question: How much did this painting cost the benighted taxpayers?

southmauldin January 13, 2015 at 7:57 pm

Who cares? If he can gloss over that pizza face and those rabbit teeth, then he can make me look like George Fucking Clooney.

Rakkasan January 13, 2015 at 4:25 pm

A little trick about polling…especially in what’s known s “advocacy research” where you start with your conclusion and then get data to support (which this is). You can ask questions about ideas, concepts, values, etc and get lots of people from ll sides to agree with you because you present the question in such a way that it has a social desirability bias, e.g. “do you think we should the elderly go without medicine so they can have adequate food to eat”. But, when you ask about actions, specific strategies, or specific programs you are likely to get very different answers. Another example, “how much domestic violence should be accepted within a marriage/relationship?” Typical answer is “none” but when put in the contexts of situations, the answer becomes “it depends” When woman walks in on husband doing the deed with best friend in her bed, should we convict her for the act of violence that follows? Very different answers. BTW, thanks for the fluff poll

Rakkasan January 13, 2015 at 4:30 pm

Sorry. Was to be posted under “Do It yourself Politics” In all the excitement I forgot whether I fired 5 shots or 6.

Site Manager January 13, 2015 at 5:49 pm

All is forgiven, just don’t let it happen again.

rdj January 13, 2015 at 4:41 pm

Im not smart enough to know if Haley is the biggest problem or the circus she runs is but… that’s the most ridiculous portrait ive ever seen. I have a degree in fine art and therefore appreciate it but she hasnt looked that virginal in many years.

Buz Martin January 13, 2015 at 4:59 pm

Portrait of The Governor as a 17-yr-old white girl with perfect skin.

Dear God,does her delusional vanity know no limits?

Bible Thumper January 13, 2015 at 5:31 pm

Does your excuses for criticizing Haley have no limit?

rdj January 13, 2015 at 6:07 pm

I ask my father all the time when he’s blasting Obama for destroying America to give me specific easy to understand things that he has done differently than any other politician to explain his point.
But I am going to flip it on you … give me some examples of things Haley has done to “better” the state of SC. And no I don’t support Obama I believe he has done little good.

Bible Thumper January 13, 2015 at 6:48 pm

That goes way beyond my comment. When you’re critical of someone, be fair about it.

rdj January 13, 2015 at 6:56 pm

Point taken … but the idea that you cant immediately think of something she had done that your proud of is sad to me. I am 42 years old and my father is 70 … I have asked him to name one thing any politician has done in his lifetime that affected his life positively and he cant do it. He says there all the same and nothing changes. He says hes just not worried about it anymore. I’ve explained to him that having a four year old that you love more than life doesn’t allow you to feel that way.

Bible Thumper January 13, 2015 at 9:38 pm

My wish is usually that the government will not have an impact on my life. I know that at least personally, so far, Obama care has had a negative impact. Good government is one that you take for granted.

rdj January 14, 2015 at 6:58 am

Poor shools, terrible roads, a dss that is being sued, there’s only one lake left in sc where its safe to eat the fish, corrupt police departments, Illegal immigrants are going to run me out of business, you read this website I dont need to keep going … our government needs a swift kick in the ass. If your ok with the incredibly ineffecient group then it leads me to believe you either work for or live off the government.
I am not trying to piss you off but the greatnesss of America is it’s people.
It just appears to me to no longer be by the people and for the people. Its more by the affluent, connected, insider for the rich, lobbyist, good ole boy politics as usual. You know as well as I do things could be much better. Ill make one point … schools … well if you are liberal, progressive whatever you think the government is GREAT if you are conservative you think the free market (ie Obamacare) can do anything better than the government except public schools. Why is this … money,votes,power etc etc its not whats best for the taxpayer its what’s best for my donar croni capatilistic bullshit.

aikencounty January 14, 2015 at 8:54 pm

Ain’t that the way of the Republicans?

rdj January 14, 2015 at 9:10 pm

Rich republicans and limousine liberals.
Very few differences.

Buz Martin January 13, 2015 at 7:20 pm

One does not have to have a degree in fine art to see that in that pic she looks like a little white debutant, all ready for the Junior League. Future member of the DAR. She should be embarrassed to have that “making the rounds.”

Bible Thumper January 13, 2015 at 9:42 pm

“white debutant, all ready for the Junior League. Future member of the DAR”
You forgot to say “Not that there’s anything wrong with that.”

Buz Martin January 13, 2015 at 10:42 pm

Right. There’s nothing wrong with it, if that’s who you are.
It’s not who she is. That painting is not who she is. She’s an attractive (to me, and to many others) middle-aged Indian-American woman who is getting a bit thick here and there, and who does not have the smoothest skin or the straightest, perkiest nose in the world. Not that there’s anything wrong with any of THAT! But it’s reality.

Bible Thumper January 14, 2015 at 12:24 am
Buz Martin January 14, 2015 at 5:37 am

You are correct. An accurate painted portrait taken from that photo would be far preferable. It would be the real her.

shifty henry January 14, 2015 at 9:45 am

Soooo — you really are a horny little devil..!!

aikencounty January 14, 2015 at 8:53 pm

AHH, go ahead and say it!
Me or you couldn’t afford the blow to fill up one side of that HONKER!

Velma Shiezinski January 13, 2015 at 9:18 pm

My guess his only complaint is the picture didn’t have her dressed in ‘Drag’ or like a 17 year-old homosexual? Not his type kind of thing, only?

shifty henry January 14, 2015 at 9:43 am

This will be the cover photo on her NEXT BIOGRAPHY…..

Bible Thumper January 13, 2015 at 5:25 pm

Savannah River Sellout? This is the winner loser zero sum economics that conservatives and libertarians should regect.
The decision should’ve been based on environmental issues and not “our state’s economic interests”.
Out state benefits from the competition of two Panamax ports. If we would not allow DHEC to block Charleston deepening then why allow it to block Savannah? In any case it was an environmental decision an promoting SC “economic interests” is not a proper role for DHEC to play.

Stooges January 13, 2015 at 6:08 pm

The environmental issues were sold out by DHEC, not by the governor per se. Her mere wish was their command.

Painter January 13, 2015 at 6:13 pm

The head doesn’t match the body

Soft Sigh from Hell January 13, 2015 at 6:16 pm

I wish I could get so many people so worked up over a simple picture of me.

“Look at that! The photographer ‘photoshopped’ out the hump and made the ear whole!”

shifty henry January 14, 2015 at 9:41 am

There was very plump girl who was seen around Lexington, and she had two tattoos – on one knee was Satan, and on the other was a bonfire. When she sat down and crossed her knees she looked like Hell….

Mike at the Beach January 13, 2015 at 6:19 pm

Is it just me or did the artist try to make her look like Mitt Romney?! Especially across the eyes…

Torch January 13, 2015 at 7:09 pm

Just had a woman on WIS that they identified as Nikki Haley, the governor. Can’t be as she didn’t look anything like this painting. ROFLMAO.

Sherry G January 13, 2015 at 10:05 pm

This lady has some serious phycological issues.

Dan Ruck January 14, 2015 at 9:51 am

“All SC families” probably don’t even know who the governor is. Or care. For sure 90 percent can’t name the Lt. Gov.

shifty henry January 14, 2015 at 9:52 am

If you look closely in the painting, in the trees, and cross your eyes I think you can see Mikie. That “pole” on the left is the one that disappeared from Platinum Plus.

nitrat January 14, 2015 at 11:20 am

The feds don’t pay for oil portraits for government officials anymore, right?

Timmy Tebow January 14, 2015 at 11:23 am

“Daddy says she’s too young, but she’s old enough for me!”

aikencounty January 14, 2015 at 2:30 pm

Toss this sullifed , cheap, wanna be tart, aside and bring me RITA JENRETTE!

They all look alike January 14, 2015 at 5:47 pm

Is it just me or does the painting look like lobbyist Jennifer Robinson from Santee Cooper?


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