Chris Christie’s Next Scandal

New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie‘s George Washington Bridge scandal was all the rage last week. Missed it? Click here and here to bring yourself up to speed … This week Christie is staring down another major scandal … allegations that he used federal relief money earmarked for victims of Superstorm…

New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie‘s George Washington Bridge scandal was all the rage last week.

Missed it? Click here and here to bring yourself up to speed …

This week Christie is staring down another major scandal … allegations that he used federal relief money earmarked for victims of Superstorm Sandy on tourism television commercials starring him and his family.

Specifically, federal investigators at the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) are probing the use of $25 million in relief money after New Jersey Rep. Frank Pallone raised questions about the spending.  And according to CNN – the network which broke the story – the agency “concluded that there was enough evidence to launch a full-scale investigation into the state’s use of federal funds.”

From CNN:

Pallone wrote that he was concerned about the bidding process for the firm awarded the marketing plan; the winning firm is charging the state about $2 million more than the next lowest bidder. The winning $4.7 million bid featured Christie and his family in the advertisements while the losing $2.5 million proposal did not feature the Christies.

Well, well …

“This was money that could have directly been used for Sandy recovery,” Pallone told CNN. “And, as you know, many of my constituents still haven’t gotten the money that is owed them to rebuild their homes or raise their homes or to help.”

But Christie – whose administration said the ads provided “value” to New Jersey taxpayers – got a big chunk of government-subsidized television time that helped propel him to a decisive reelection victory.

(RELATED: “Disaster Relief: More Big Government Boondoggling“)

The leading “establishment Republican” candidate heading into the 2016 election cycle, Christie has built his political brand as a no-nonsense straight shooter.  That reputation is now on very shaky ground.

Not surprisingly, the GOP establishment has rushed to Christie’s defense …

In early voting South Carolina – where Christie is likely to spend a lot of time campaigning in the near future – the Republican apologist website GOPWrite.com took note of “a palatable hate” (we assume they meant to say “palpable” hate) against Christie, most of coming it “from Libertarians and Tea Partiers.”

And of course the ultimate GOP establishment apologist – S.C. Gov. Nikki Haley – rushed to Christie’s defense saying his handling of the bridge scandal “showed leadership.”

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Once you go fat... January 13, 2014 at 9:09 am

Does anyone wonder how this fat fucker wipes his ass?

Does he pay an ass wiper to do it, or does he force his poor wife to wade into the job?

jimlewisowb January 13, 2014 at 9:25 am

There is one advantage to his size.

If he happened to be on a jet and a window broke out resulting in rapid cabin decompression, there is no way his ass would be sucked out of the plane

Oh, to answer you question. The Governor always travels with a portable “bidet”.which resulted in saving New Jersey taxpayers money. Before the “bidet” there was a staff of 14 who were available 24/7

Smirks January 13, 2014 at 9:29 am Reply
The Colonel January 13, 2014 at 10:35 am

That reminds me of my favorite “entertainer hygiene” question – How does Stevie Wonder know when he’s done wiping?

CorruptionInColumbia January 13, 2014 at 10:46 am

I have pondered such mysteries of life many times, Colonel. I imagine a blind person who was confronted with the problem of post movement hygiene would be in the same boat as a sighted person on a moonless, starless, night, with no other source of illumination around.

Would they sniff the paper, corn cobb, or pine cone, after each wipe?
If they were afflicted with a sinus infection and could not smell very well, what then? Would they have to lick it to ascertain if another wipe were needed or not?

My friends tell me I think too much.

The Unknown Comic January 13, 2014 at 10:53 am

“My friends tell me I think too much.”

lol…they have a loose definition of the term “thinking”.


shifty henry January 13, 2014 at 4:00 pm

I guess that makes me a friend now – HAH!

The Unknown Comic January 13, 2014 at 10:55 am

Red Foxx- “You got to wash your ass.”


Braile keyboard January 13, 2014 at 2:41 pm

Same as the sighted – the paper doesn’t slip as much. You know you’re done but you just take a peek to make sure. I just don’t get to peek. The only one who ever notices a miss is the lady who comes in from the VA to wash my laundry, and my service dog. If he ever goes missing I know to expect a tongue lashing from the housekeeper in the near future. As for the next commenter who is bound to ask does the lady wash my fucking dog; the answer is yes asshole.

The Colonel January 13, 2014 at 2:52 pm

I wish I could tell from the friction – I use baby wipes and just scrub till I’m clean.
Thanks for answering I genuinely have always wondered.

shifty henry January 13, 2014 at 4:08 pm

also, helps to reduce ass itch, does it?……

The Colonel January 13, 2014 at 4:56 pm

Rash and roids…

Jay Ellington January 14, 2014 at 10:57 am

One word, manpon.

Smirks January 13, 2014 at 9:27 am

Today’s caption: “Guess who farted?”

CorruptionInColumbia January 13, 2014 at 9:46 am

Barry’s cheating. Notice how he is using isometric pressure between his arms to try and squeeze one out.

Smirks January 13, 2014 at 2:52 pm

That could have unintended consequences, therefore it isn’t necessarily cheating. Obama’s merely taking a gamble. Judging from Christie’s face, though, it sounds like it didn’t pay off.

Gonna be a looooooooong trip…

shifty henry January 13, 2014 at 4:06 pm

Lil’ Barry is worrying that Christie is going to fart, and that the resulting exponential difference in cabin pressure might divert AF1 to New Jersey…

MashPotato January 13, 2014 at 9:43 am

I hate Chris Christie! I HATE HIM!

They’re right, this hate is rather pleasing to the palate.

CorruptionInColumbia January 13, 2014 at 9:44 am

Hopefully, we will see this RINO fall, long before we get into the Presidential primaries, much like Herman Cain and other RINO’s fell by the wayside as their various scandals were brought to light, last time around. Unfortunately, all of them did not have their dirty laundry aired in time to save us from the debacle of having Mittens Romney as our loser Presidential candidate against 0bama. I hope we lose Huckabee, Santorum, and any Bush family cruds who might be thinking of running to scandals before we wind up with them on the ballot.

Beachtiger0412 January 13, 2014 at 9:48 am

This this whole deal remind you of Mitt Romney and how the tea partiers were so mad at Nikki Haley for supporting Mitt Romney. I think Haley’s supports hate Chris Christy even more-wait and see if there is push back.

CorruptionInColumbia January 13, 2014 at 9:52 am

Well, in a small way, there already is. My disgust with Haley’s support of Christie and Grahamnasty has reached the point where I am ready to vote for Sheheen directly, if he is her strongest opponent in November. Before that, I was content to just let her lose by default when my vote that went for her four years ago goes to a third-party candidate, this time around.

She has become so smug, so arrogant, and so ridiculous on so many levels, we cannot chance another four years of her in the Governor’s mansion. No, I don’t expect great things from Sheheen either and never did, but unless he pleasantly surprises us, we can vote him out after four years, too.

RogueElephant January 13, 2014 at 10:31 am

The more I think about it the more I wonder if four years of Sheheen would teach the establishment Republicans a lesson. Probably not as they would blame we right wingers for staying home. You know that is why McCain and Romney lost. Not their brainless, spineless policies. Either way the establishment types think they are always right and the people are to be led down the garden path. Just shut up and stay in line. South Carolina will pretty well run itself for four years then we can clean house. The senate race is the do or die for 14. We must keep Tim Scott in office. He is the right man for the job in so many different ways. Then Grahamnasty has to go. As the race shakes out I’m looking for Bill Connor to rise to the occasion. By far the most qualified, mature candidate in the race. And the only one with foreign policy experience. Our numbers in the state house and the down ballot state officers look pretty good. Of course this is January. June might be a whole new ballgame. I just hate to waste four years, I don’t have that many more election cycles in me. RESTORE HONOR VOTE BILL CONNOR.

venomachine January 13, 2014 at 12:46 pm

Hopefully, she’ll lose to a challenger in the primaries.

miss suzanne January 13, 2014 at 11:55 am

Not to mention their weight problem.

The Colonel January 13, 2014 at 10:21 am

Can somebody say “next already”? Fatboy won’t win this, he won’t even win in the primaries. The media is barking at his porcine ankles, his policies are all over the place. His rep as a hard ass will only play in some places.

Just as an aside if he were to win he would more than likely surpass Taft as the fattest president ever. Taft was 5’11” and weighed about 335. Christie is the about the same height but goes about 345.

Even the bulbous nosed Clinton looked like he was in shape when he was first elected and with all his side issues he had a fairly consistent run as “gubernor” of Arkansas or whatever backwoods he was from. from http://beforeafterpictures.tumblr.com/image/388318716

guest January 13, 2014 at 10:30 am

It looks like you are tired of blasting your own Governor, so you are going out of state to blast another Governor.

CNSYD January 13, 2014 at 10:48 am

I am sure it was simply an intentional oversight, but Pallone is a Democrat. So you expect him to say good things about a Republican?

johnq January 13, 2014 at 11:22 am

Christie being a republican automatically means we should assume he is corrupt and immoral.

Pig Farmers best friend January 13, 2014 at 2:34 pm

Oh hell yeah – he will start at the Beacon in Spartanburg, move directly to Piggy Park then swing on down to Dukes, head up to Scotts, troll up and down Shem Creek for 2 days, swing back to the Beacon and terminate his journey at Twin Peaks. As for dinner each day it will be dinner clubs, strip joints and backroom meetings.

Jake January 13, 2014 at 2:43 pm

Why does this picture make me think of the Blues Brothers?

Thomas January 13, 2014 at 3:42 pm

Rumor is he held Obama’s hand after Sandy because he knew if Romney won, Gov Chris would have to wait 8 years to run for President. I do not fault him there. Four years of Romney would be unbearable. Then again, 4 years of Hillary is simply unfathomable. Gov Chris called it right after Sandy. He called it right on his staff’s hilarious prank, and the Clintonites tremble in their dens at his approach in 2016. I understand him; we can work with a President Christie in 2016-2020.

What the the Alpha Charlie did not count on was a cowardly Boehner and a smarmy McConnell running interference against brave and free American Citizens….is that a cavalry charge I hear?…..against all enemies foreign or domestic.

(. . . -)

shifty henry January 13, 2014 at 4:20 pm

Well, from how some of the comments below got off the subject (sort of), there goes my remark on a different article about improving our IQ this week….

idcydm January 13, 2014 at 6:33 pm

Not that I’m a big Cristie fan but, now that the fed to include DOJ is involved I wouldn’t be a bit surprised that it comes up with something. I trust this administration as far as I can throw it, after all if you like your plan you can keep your plan and Benghazi happened because of a video.

nitrat January 14, 2014 at 5:50 pm

Rand Paul was the first person to bring this up at a Senate hearing months ago.


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