“Keckstrom” Made Sex Tapes?

  STATE’S TOP ACCOUNTANT SAID TO HAVE “LIBRARY” OF ILLICIT LIAISONS WITH MISTRESS-TURNED-FIANCEE S.C. Comptroller General Richard Eckstrom made sex tapes starring himself and his longtime mistress (now fiancée) Kelly Payne, sources familiar with the couple’s on-again, off-again relationship tell FITS. And yes … we apologize if you just lost…



S.C. Comptroller General Richard Eckstrom made sex tapes starring himself and his longtime mistress (now fiancée) Kelly Payne, sources familiar with the couple’s on-again, off-again relationship tell FITS.

And yes … we apologize if you just lost your lunch.

It’s not that sex tapes starring Payne would necessarily be a bad thing (we’d pay money to see those), it’s the saggy naughty bits of our state’s 64-year-old “Republican” Comptroller that we’d rather not have seared into our consciousness.

When were the tapes allegedly made?  It’s not clear.  Sources familiar with the recordings say they are part of an “extensive video/ photographic library” maintained by Eckstrom – who is a devout social conservative and member of a prominent downtown Columbia, S.C. church.  It’s also not immediately clear whether Payne – a former GOP candidate for State Superintendent of Education – is the only woman featured in Eckstrom’s library (he’s boasted of affairs with other women, remember).

Or whether she’s the woman featured in this sample image obtained by FITS …

(Click to enlarge – NSFW version here)

Ba-DAM, people.  Ba-DAM.

You just GOTTA love South Carolina politics.

Over the Thanksgiving holiday, Payne’s Facebook page trumpeted the news of her engagement to Eckstrom – the second time the two toxic lovers have announced plans to wed this year.  The first time was in February – although less than two months later the wedding was off.

Believe it or not, just two weeks before announcing her (latest) engagement to Eckstrom, Payne told a friend that he was a “control freak” and “still an ass.”

Eckstrom’s creepy texts and emails to Payne have became the stuff of S.C. political legend – including one in which he referred to himself as a “fine specimen” and another in which he offered to be her “sexual guinea pig.”

Guess he recorded that experimentation for posterity …

Eckstrom was married at the time these provocative messages were sent, although he has since gotten a divorce.

After a high-profile split during the 2010 GOP primary season, Payne and Eckstrom reunited prior to the general election. Of course within weeks they became embroiled in yet another public soap opera – this one ending with Payne filing a police report against Eckstrom.

Eckstrom’s combative relationship with Payne was the subject of a Democratic TV ad during the 2010 campaign … as was a 1997 sexual harassment case that the Comptroller settled with $57,000 of your tax dollars (here are a pair of pictures of the woman that Eckstrom allegedly harassed, in case you’re interested).

Despite all of this drama, Eckstrom was not only reelected Comptroller in November 2010 – but was placed in command of the South Carolina State Guard last spring.


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BigT November 28, 2012 at 12:32 pm

Did Eckstrom ‘OUT’ Sanford or something???

Why is a “Libertarian” so Intent on getting into these peoples’ bedroom???

I thought yall claim ‘what people do in their personal time is there business’???

Hypoctites…all of you…

President Perry November 28, 2012 at 12:50 pm

Your “support” of Mitt Romney made you Hypocrite #1. Forever.

BigT November 28, 2012 at 3:23 pm

I’d support any Republican over the Failure-in-cheif in office now…And I’m disgusted the Republican did not win…

You see: I care about my country…not the politics of Hate and you…

Dr. You Know Who November 28, 2012 at 5:36 pm

I believe Will’s point is: Do what you like, unless you’re a lying piece of shit. This is a conserative, christian womanizer whose ego and “preceived” vanity are off the charts. …but at least he’s not a Dem, right?

jitty November 28, 2012 at 7:49 pm Reply
President Perry November 28, 2012 at 9:46 pm

Hy-po-crite. Oh, and you are loser…again. HAHAHAHAHAHA! Grab your rations and head to the basement with Glenn Beck, you dick.

President Perry November 28, 2012 at 9:48 pm

You care about your country, yet you will vote for the likes of Haley and this pervert Eckstrom…again. You may love your country, but you really hate yourself, don’t you, BigoT.

Dr. D November 28, 2012 at 12:55 pm

These Bible thumpers!
Mark Sanford was one, touted his faith, “Jenny and our four boys”.

David Beasley was one, he had a Jenny too!

Bob Peeler campaigned on “Faith Family and Friends” haad his Donna next door.

Haley reformed SIKH, now Methodist, hasn’t graced the doors of Church since election, she had em all!

Knotts, “taking the devils money to do God’s will”, had a few ladies of the night.

Danny Frazier, talked of joining Saxe Gotha (for political reasons) on the advice of Halfacre, Peeler and Donna. His mockery is self evident.

Metts, his ladiess of the night became infamous!

Eckstrom and Kelly, infamous and weird beyond understanding. Announces his religion as a practice of his politics.

The Devils own, all and making a mockery of God’s house and name.

Dr. Stephen Hawking November 28, 2012 at 1:00 pm

Perhaps Eckstrom arrived here from the “far side”.

Ha! (this is only worth one Ha!)

Dr. Stephen Hawking November 28, 2012 at 1:05 pm

Although, purely as an intellectual exercise, I am interested in examining the videos of Ms. Payne (alone, of course).

Uncle Remus November 28, 2012 at 1:01 pm

I’m gonna pass on seeing those tapes. Can you imagine? BUt, on the other side, at least he can still achieve a stiff erection.

Smirks November 28, 2012 at 1:17 pm

Can you imagine?

“Can” and “want to” are two completely things.

Sailor November 28, 2012 at 1:22 pm

So can you with a little Viagara!

the Joker November 28, 2012 at 1:22 pm

Via-a-a-gra! makes for a stiff election… erection.

This. November 28, 2012 at 1:24 pm Reply
bogart November 28, 2012 at 1:31 pm

Love that lamp… the way that’s an old man’s ass,not a woman,and KP needs to be on some kind of meds.

Robert November 28, 2012 at 2:53 pm

I was wondering what the pic was of….tits without nipples?

WillieManickney November 28, 2012 at 3:17 pm

Click on the “here” in the nsfw area. Nice rack, but maybe remanufatured. :>)

carrie November 28, 2012 at 4:28 pm

Bogart, how can you tell the difference between men’s and women’s behinds? They all look alike to me.

bogart November 28, 2012 at 5:07 pm

@carrie….women have them and old men don’t…but I just looked at this picture enlarged and no doubt about it,this is a picture of the Gaffney water tank.

Aloha Steve November 28, 2012 at 1:58 pm

Having gone out with her once or twice myself, but not really getting anywhere (because she is bat-shit crazy), I would like to see the sex tape if for no other reason to make sure that I don’t regret putting a little more effort into trying to bang her.

Robert November 28, 2012 at 2:54 pm

Please tell us more, because just reading her FB page and these stories would already tell us she is a major piece of work.

I’m just curious if the school district is seeing any of this.

D5 observer November 28, 2012 at 8:15 pm

What these two insects do in their personal lives should be their business but it became public when Payne and Eckstrom made their personal filth public knowledge. Payne leaked personal details of her affair with Comproller General Eckstrom. She provided personal e-mails, voice mails, filed false police reports and made false claims of engagements, her pathological make should disqualify her from being around children and yet she is allowed to continue to teach in district 5. She invited Eckstrom back to her classroom just weeks after filing a police report saying she thought he might kill her. Now there are x-rated pictures, movies for high school children to see or speculate about. Let’s see if the newly elected District 5 board has any cojones or whether this is another sexcapade District 5 turns a blind eye to.

Aloha Steve November 29, 2012 at 1:41 pm

Interestingly, her FB page is blocked as to me. Says I don’t have permission to view it but other people I know in my office can see it. Wonder if her psycho boyfriend made her go through and delete everyone she ever went out with?

It was super casual but she spent most of her time talking about he wasn’t even an accountant and whether I knew someone we could recruit to run against him in the next election who was an accountant. Needless to say, it made for a fun night.

Control Freaky November 30, 2012 at 8:27 am

Aloha Steve

If you think it’s her psycho boyfriend blocking people of facebook think again. He only hates that she is a social media whore he’s okay with the actual whore part.

Can you imagine the list of men that would be blocked.
Her facebook friend list would go from 5,000 to 696. It’s about how many votes she got.

Aloha Steve November 28, 2012 at 1:59 pm

And if you have that FITS, you have to have more!

Jeffy01 November 28, 2012 at 2:25 pm

Ick. Two old prune looking guys having sex together. Other than Boz…who would watch it?

@BozMartin November 28, 2012 at 7:50 pm

I would not watch, dipshit. I don’t like porn with guys in it. Solo strip and she-bop or girl-on girl only.

Aloha Steve November 29, 2012 at 8:57 am

I would think most of it would be solo shots of her while he sat around hoping to get it up

Crooner November 29, 2012 at 4:17 pm


It’s probably not a good idea to discuss your porn preferences on a message board. Especially when they’re homophobic.

@BozMartin November 29, 2012 at 6:13 pm

I did not know that. Who else knew that?

Well, thank you for the educational criticism. I now know that it is homophobic to not be sexually titillated by penises, but only by tits, ass and vagina. Previously, I thought that was just a matter of what turns me on due to my own sexual preferences. Now I see that I am guilty of begin biased against …

WAIT A MINUTE! That’s bullshit! And I don’t need your lame ass to tell me what’s a good idea to post and what isn’t. I’ll fuck things up for myself or not on my own, thank you.

I am obviously on a mission to forever preclude the possibility of being a serious candidate for public office. Of course, the presence of horrid freaks like “Keckstrom” in SC politics may indicate that it takes a good bit more that talking about preferences in porn to inoculate one against that, but I figure the sheer preponderance of my outrageously self-revelatory posts on this blog will somehow tip the balance.

Post Toasties November 28, 2012 at 2:54 pm

I agree with Bogart. Is that an ass? Where are the nipples? If those are indeed breasts, they must be on a mannequin. A rubber doll is what I think Dickie would like anyway!

Whatever November 28, 2012 at 3:20 pm

I’d rather watch my cat hock up a hairball than those two.

the Joker November 28, 2012 at 3:41 pm

Probably be just as exciting!

marty November 29, 2012 at 6:29 am

Best response of the thread.

Dr. (Well I'll Be) M.D. November 28, 2012 at 3:52 pm

Heeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyy damn nice antique lamp!

Aloha Steve November 29, 2012 at 1:38 pm

I was thinking someone ought to be able to identify that as being in either one of their houses.

carrie November 28, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Speaking of engagement, what’s the latest with Mark Sanford and his Argentina mistress turned fiancee? Did they get married? Are they living together? Oh, one more question, is Mark still with Fox?

bogart November 28, 2012 at 5:25 pm

I know he’s not married because I haven’t gotten my invitation and I’m sure he’s still with fox,as in sly,….her name is Belen Chapur.

carrie November 28, 2012 at 8:27 pm

Bogart, I meant Fox News. I know they both are as sly as fox.

Grateful Deadhead November 28, 2012 at 4:25 pm

funny how a lamp can get a motherfucker in a world of hurt.

Mr. Dixie November 28, 2012 at 4:56 pm

I wish there had been better lighting when they took that picture. It looks like there is a huge knot on that left cheek at the top. It makes it look like an alien trying to jump out of that big ass. That footage could be used in the new movie ” Alien 4 “

Dr. Stephen Hawking November 28, 2012 at 5:47 pm

Those are breasts. See the NSFW picture which shows the nipple/areola. Because the breasts are full/rounded/swelled the other nipple/areola is further on the other side – sort of around the corner so to speak.

——-or these could be the DOUBLE MOONS lost for eons and which have been noted in ancient mythology! Woe to me – for I was not the one who discovered these!

—– and I could have named them!

Uncle Remus November 28, 2012 at 6:04 pm

Dude should have set sights higher and go for Ms. Alice Eve who is on the site this week. When can we expect a new update in that arena?

Uncle Remus November 28, 2012 at 6:05 pm

Those are nice breasts in the photo. Perky. But no hard or puffy nipples. She is clearly not yet turned on. Maybe Eckstrom didn’t excite?

Soft Sigh from Hell November 28, 2012 at 7:18 pm

I’d probably cough up a modest amount just to keep from having to see it.

jimlewis,owb November 28, 2012 at 7:24 pm

Nice camera Mr. SOB is holding.

Given the fact that Mr. SOB is widely reported to be one cheap ass bastard, I would contend that the camera pictured and any recorder/camera/cell phone he used to make his tapes was purchased with State funds.

The same could be said for any tapes, flash drives or media cards.

Odds are that all tapes/images, etc, have been stored on computers purchased with State funds.

Therefore I think any interested taxpayer should stop by Cromer’s, pick up a hot dog, box of popcorn, a bag of boiled peanuts, a large coke then proceed to Saggy Old Balls’ State funded office and demand to take a look at what they paid for.

Oh, forget one thing. While at Cromer’s ask them to give you at least 3 or 4 empty brown bags. It is almost certain that you will either hyperventilate or throw up your toenails while watching the tapes.

Dick Scrotum November 28, 2012 at 7:39 pm

Old Ecky would be proud for this stuff to leak out.

Er, poor choice of words.

BigT November 28, 2012 at 7:43 pm

For people who CLAIM to be so open-minded…you liberals and “libertarians” sure are trying to Murder these poeple based on your own Small-Minds, that demand that they live under YOUR morality…

You seek to Control the lives of the people you hate (and er’body else)…you are True Obam-ites…

@BozMartin November 28, 2012 at 8:11 pm

I’m really pretty much detached from this particular trainwreck, actually. Much more important fucked up shit going on in SC and the world.

I will note in passing, though, that Payne may pretend to be all about fiscal conservatism, what with her work with the SCPC, but in fact the saner libertarian types that I know of who support that org have nothing at all to do with the fanatical “Christianity” of nutbags like Michelle Bachmann, who Payne shilled for in the primaries.

Bachmann announced at some point that she is “subservient” to her husband Marcus. Let’s examine this. She was running for POTUS. Marcus is a gay-hating gay man and a religion-obsessed voodoo shrink who supposedly can help homosexuals “pray the gay away.” Therefore, had won the nomination and then the election, our president-elect at this time would be “subservient” to a horribly fucked up excuse for a human being. And those people are (shudder!) foster partents.

Granted, terminal nutbags KP and RE have a ways to go to top that. But I guess that IF the hideous videos discussed here are real and IF/WHEN they are released, those who have stomachs strong enough for such fare will know, for sure, who actually tops who. And how.

In other words, is she “subservient”? As in SUB-SERvent-devIENT? (yeah, I know. Sp?)

OK, I’m done with this. As I said, there are more important issues. Bath salts in the State House water supply, for example. WHEN will they get that stuff out of there?

Astonished November 28, 2012 at 7:59 pm

You all have been mooned!!!

shifty henry November 28, 2012 at 8:09 pm

Can someone explain what the joke is with “KECKSTROM”?

Mike at the Beach November 28, 2012 at 8:12 pm

Two quick questions that demonstaret my ignorance:

1. What’s the “Keckstrom” reference about?


2. Who cares who’s in “command” of the SC State Guard, a non-military and absolutely irrelevant (not to mention a bit bizarre) SC construct?

9" November 28, 2012 at 9:30 pm

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Mr. Dixie November 29, 2012 at 9:16 am

I am embarrassed beyond belief!! I have been told several times that I didn’t know my Ass from a Hole IN the Ground. But now I find, I don’t know an Ass from a set of Tits either.

Mojo Nixon Esquire Budweiser Junior III November 29, 2012 at 1:31 pm


Mike Hammer November 29, 2012 at 10:09 am

This is the sort of broad I want for my next adventure. I’m working on an outline – but if anybody has suggestions?

Ryan November 29, 2012 at 6:43 pm

To: District 5 observer. You don’t have to worry about the newly elected school board caring about this. They go after the ones they want to on this sort of thing and look the other way, or actually cover up, the others. Actually Ms. Payne is on the friends’ list of some of the Chairman of the Board supporters at District 5’s facebook page.


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