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Hey Everybody … Barack Obama Fixed It!



USA!!! USA!!! USA!!! USA!!!

So this just in … back from his vacation on Martha’s Vineyard, U.S. president Barack Obama took his Teleprompter for a spin in Charlotte, N.C.  In a speech to the American Legion’s national convention, Obama offered up a vision of America starkly at odds with reality.

Ready for an overdose of “American exceptionalism?”  Obama has got you covered …

“The United States is better positioned to lead in the 21st century than any nation on Earth,” Obama told convention attendees. “It’s not even close. We have the most powerful military in history. That’s certainly not close. From Europe to Asia, our alliances are unrivaled. Our economy is the most dynamic. We’ve got the best workers. We’ve got the best businesses. We have the best universities and the best scientists.”

(Sarcasm warning) Is everybody feeling this guy or what?  Oh hell yeah!  Never mind those pesky income levels.  Or that super shrinking workforce.

Of course Obama – or at least his reality-challenged Teleprompter – was just getting warmed up.

After days of letting his underlings fearmonger on foreign policy, Obama decided it was time to play the “moral obligation” card.

“Nobody else can do what we do,” he said.  “No other nation does more to underwrite the security and prosperity on which the world depends.  In times of crisis, no other nation can rally such broad coalitions to stand up for international norms and peace.  In times of disaster, no other nation has the capabilities to deliver so much so quickly.  No nation does more to help citizens claim their rights and build their democracies. No nation does more to help people in the far corners of the Earth escape poverty and hunger and disease and realize their dignity.”

Ummmm … okay.  But what about Detroit?  Or rural South Carolina?  Or Ferguson?

Check yourself, fool … Obama ain’t talking ’bout those places.  He’s in “We are the World” mode.

“Even countries that criticize us, when the chips are down and they need help, they know who to call,” Obama continued.  “They call us.”

Well … yeah.  Because we’re dumb enough to keep bankrupting our future generations on a never-ending stream of sh*t that isn’t our problem.

“That’s what American leadership looks like,” Obama added.  “It’s why the United States is and will remain the one indispensable nation in the world.”

Turn it UP, people …

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