Print this Page

By Mande Wilkes || South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley has an “open marriage,” if the word on the street is to be believed – and I hope it is. To be sure, this rumor is perhaps the only redemptive thing being uttered about Governor Haley (who, for what it’s worth, fronted South Carolina’s establishment takeover of the once-promising Tea Party movement).

Anyway, if Governor Haley has an open marriage then she’s probably more ‘with-it’ than I’ve given her credit for.

To wit: Her alleged open marriage signals a certain cultivated femininity, notwithstanding her peculiar determination to ignore fiscally responsible female candidates in favor of the failed status quo.

Cultivated femininity … in large part, that’s what an open marriage represents.

Despite what “they” tell us (“they” being Cosmo magazine editors and other such “feminist fighters”), open marriages are at least as beneficial to wives as to husbands, if not more so. Husbands are easily satisfied: They simply need their wives to act like their girlfriends (that’s why I’m a loud defender of mistresses, by the way).

Wives, though … wives need more, different, new.

I hear from so many women who wish their husbands would agree to an open marriage, and I hear from so many women who are lucky enough to be in an open marriage and who cite that as a main reason that they are such attentive wives.

Now, to be clear, I don’t endorse sex outside of marriage. Pretty much without exception. Which is precisely why open marriages are so well-suited to women: Women don’t benefit from the extramarital sex itself, but from the prelude to it and the possibility of it.

It’s all in our heads, in other words … and we all know that’s where the best sex goes down.

Author’s Note: Mande Wilkes is … well, we’re sure you’ve heard. A presumptive (and presumptuous) candidate for South Carolina’s 7th Congressional district, Mande’s not really a lawyer but she does play one on TV. Host of ‘On the Spot with Mande Wilkes’ and author of “Crashing the Club,” Mande believes that there’s really no such thing as an unflattering shade of limelight. For her official website, click here