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FITSNews – December 20, 2007 – There was a time (above) when we would have loved to see Jennifer Love Hewitt pose nude for Playboy, of course that was before somebody decided to park a minivan inside her rear end. Now there are actually gay fruit flies that turn us on more than the thought of her naked body barely squeezing into one of those three-page foldouts.

Of course, Us Magazine obviously enjoys being either very stupid or very sadistic about Hewitt’s nudie offer, because the magazine published an online poll today asking whether or not its readers thought J-Love should have accepted Playboy’s invite or not (breathe easy, people, she declined).

As of this afternoon, 33% of respondants said Hewitt should’ve posed nude while 67% percent agreed with her decision to decline the offer. Of course, saying “agreed with her decision to decline the offer” is an incredibly polite way to describe that 67%. Much nicer, for example, than “Dear God No!” or “Are You F*cking Kidding Me?” or “Kill Me Now,” to name a just few. But then again we wrote it just that way because, duh, we are so polite.

As for the 33% of Us readers who wanted to see Tank-ass naked, there’s still hope for you. For example, Oprah might decide to put a Shallow Hal DVD in your Christmas stocking or something …