colton hodge

Man Sings Metallica Ballad To Nikki Haley

AND “GANGSTA RAPS” AGAINST A SMALL SCHOOL ATHLETICS DIRECTOR

Meet Colton Hodge. He’s a 30-year-old unemployed Spartanburg, S.C. resident who volunteers at one of our state’s numerous taxpayer-funded institutions of higher learning.

Based on what we can tell from Hodge’s latest YouTube video, he’s incensed that he is not the athletics director at the University of South Carolina Upstate … and is trying to convince S.C. Gov. Nikki Haley to help him fire the current occupant of that position, Mike Hall.

“I’m a regular person that had extraordinary teachers but I can’t really figure out why I’m not worth saving from the unemployment line while an administrator that played golf at a (Division 2) Bible College thirty years ago collects a six-figure salary from the state without any actual knowledge of athletics or the ability to raise funds outside of charging student fees,” Hodge tells Haley in his video.

“I need your help,” he pleads with the governor. “Let me show you how those without a voice feel.”

Hodge then launches into a painfully off-key karaoke rendition of Metallica’s 1992 power ballad “Nothing Else Matters” set to video clips of his workouts.

After a few minutes of that, he breaks into an original “gangsta rap” against Hall that includes numerous violent references – including death threats.

“I’ll be goddamned if I’m gonna let Mike Hall get my ass,” Hodge raps.

The video ends with a still picture of Haley set to the tune of Gary Wright’s 1976 hit “Dream Weaver.”

We’ve been doing this a long time, people, and we’ve never seen anything quite like this.

Enjoy …

As you may suspect, we have a simple solution to this drama … do away with USC-Upstate’s athletics department entirely. Or better yet, privatize the school and let it pursue both its academics and athletics’ destinies independent of taxpayer resources.

We would also be happy to recommend a few vocal coaches to Hodge … and some good lawyers.

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