Starting with its semantically-nonsensical premise, America’s “War on Terror” (-ism) has only been slightly more effective than its “War on Drugs.”
Which is to say it hasn’t been very effective at all.
One big problem? We’ve basically tried to have it both ways – on the one hand clumsily attempting to exact vengeance for a bloody attack on our nation eight years ago, but on the other hand pandering to the politically correct sensibilities of the “global community” in waging our unfocused aggression.
As we’ve noted, that’s no way to fight a war … against terror(ism) or any other -ism, for that matter.
Of course, while we’ve been fighting an enemy we can’t see with one hand tied behind our backs, America has also been dealing with a P.C. uproar over the “plight” of some 270 enemy combatants currently detained at the U.S. military base in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.
President Barack Obama wants to move these detainees to America – specifically to the Naval Consolidated Brig at the Charleston Naval Weapons Station in Berkeley County, S.C. He also wants to give these terrorist suspects a civilian trial, affording them the same constitutional rights granted to American citizens.
All of this – every bit of it – is pure insanity, obviously, and not just the notion that a foreign terrorist suspect should get the same rights as an American accused of a crime. Equally guilty of moronisitude in this instance are our knuckle-dragging South Carolina Republican politicians – who are currently beating their chests in an effort to “prevent” these detainees being moved to South Carolina soil.
Eager to score some cheap political points (and believe us, these would be among the cheapest ever scored), dozens of SCGOP politicians are tripping over themselves to oppose the transfer of these detainees. In doing so, they are playing to the irrational fears of uneducated South Carolinians who are dumb enough to believe there’s a chance that these rag heads will end up running through the streets of our cities.
Please.
We’re going to put these “people” in cells, right?
Cells behind fences, right?
With those cells and fences locked, right?
Oh, and guarded by people with guns, right?
Check, check, check and check (last time we “checked,” anyway).
Furthermore (and this is a point we find highly compelling), where was the outrage from all these GOP politicians when former President George W. Bush moved three enemy combatants – Yasser Hamdi, Jose Padilla and Ali Saleh Kahlah al-Marri – to South Carolina during his administration?
Yeah … answer that one Gresham Barrett, and Henry Brown, and Jim DeMint, and Joe Wilson and any of the other Republican panderers looking to get their names in the paper playing on people’s fears. Answer that one, if you can.
Of course, that brings us to our main point.
What the f*ck are we doing giving these bastards “three hots and a cot” to begin with – whether in Guantanamo Bay, the Charleston brig or anyplace else?
Why have we not simply strapped them to cruise missiles and launched their smelly, bearded asses into the 270 highest-value terrorist targets that our intelligence agencies can come up with?
Frankly that’s our solution to this “crisis” – send ‘em back from whence they came and let their people clean up the mess.
Of course in the “Happy Norwuz” world in which we live, that sort of justice will never happen. After all, what would the U.N. say? Or our “coalition of the willing?”
And so nothing happens – and the status of these combatants becomes nothing more than another wedge issue for a bunch of intellectually incurious blowhards to profit from politically.
Sad, huh?
Just as we’ve gone soft as a nation in responding to the countries that sponsor terrorism, we’ve gone soft on its actual practitioners as well – apparently forgetting that the airplanes which ripped through the World Trade Center towers, the Pentagon and a field in Pennsylvania didn’t discriminate when it came to their victims.
That’s the efficacy of asymmetrical warfare, people. And if you think for one second that al Qaeda hasn’t already won the “war on terror(ism)” – and won it convincingly – you’re nuts.
While they plan fresh violence against U.S. troops and civilians all over the world, we’re debating where to house their dregs – and how we can afford them American rights that they most assuredly do not deserve.
By William November 7, 2009 at 10:20 am
Leave them at Gitmo
By blackjack November 7, 2009 at 11:17 am
The reason they get three hots & a cot is because Grahamesty insisted we apply the Geneva Convention Accords to the Terrorist. Did you hear? He’s for bringin um to Charleston for trial. Are you shocked?
By Old Bike Dude November 7, 2009 at 12:42 pm
Why is it that right wingnuts are allllll about the constitution, untilll it allows for something they don’t like. Then instead of understanding the law they choose to blame someone they don’t like. Again I say that the GOP has become the party of juveniles, all sulking and name calling. But then with a leader such as Rush Limbaugh what can one expect.
By Just another Joe November 7, 2009 at 1:26 pm
Bring them to the Charleston brig. This will mean more jobs, both military and civilians. More jobs is good. With a major port and several military installations, Charleston is undoubtedly a terrorist target anyway. One more reason shouldn’t matter. I do, however,believe the internees should be tried in a military court rather than a civilian court. They are described as being enemy combatants aren’t they.
By Ynot November 7, 2009 at 2:38 pm
Lindsey Graham doesn’t want the civil courts used to try anyone connected with terrorism.
What is in this for him?
By John_Haversock November 7, 2009 at 5:00 pm
First, the count now at GITMO is 215. Second, though many detainees will be tried (civilian or military courts) or released/transferred, we will still have a lot that we will detain (under Law of War provisions). GITMO probably will stay open longer because of them as they are the toughest cases to ‘dispose’ of. Since their length of detention will be undetermined/subject to periodic review, they will present the most politically explosive issue. If they get moved to U.S. prisons, expect a BIG fight. Third, other locations besides Charleston are being considered. I think that those spots may have less political clout to reject them, so SC political pandering may work.
Finally, I think the appropriate punishment to give the worst of the detainees is to confine them to an isolated (read solitary confinement), stark island (no, not GITMO, think Midway or Johnson Atoll) for the rest of their natural lives without hope of parole. Break them, crush their souls and show our enemies that we will deny them martyrdom. Anyway, we’ll have very few detainees in the future because most U.S. military personnel are now much less inclined to take dangerous prisoners that will be released.
By Jockaira's Comic Relief November 7, 2009 at 7:34 pm
Re: Jihad Watch: It’s getting harder by the minute to say he just “snapped”: Fort Hood jihadist linked to 9/11 jihadists
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Author Profile Page Jockaira | November 7, 2009 2:59 PM | Reply
I admire your long chain of reasoned argument about the sexual orientation of Major Hasan.
I disagree with your conclusion that Major Hasan was homosexual of any type based solely upon available news reports, although he does fit certain “profiles,” being a psychiatrist in a tight-fitting uniform with a decided sashay in his chubby buns.
On the other hand, I think any party boys would run screaming from “Ol Bullethead.”
Major Hasan’s Imam probably knew him better than any other except for the barrista at 7-11 and was probably right when he summed up the Major’s unsuccessful search for a willing female by the opinion that he was just too particular. The Imam had helped him through the unfamiliar territory of Muslim dating by helping him to write profiles of pleasant-sounding lies about what a great catch the Major was. He wanted a women who religiously prayed to Mecca five times daily with never any excuses (even for her monthly visitor). He wanted a woman willing to snuggle up next to his fat puffy potbelly and accept his god-given seminal essence, not once but as many times as it took to pop out a brood of tiny boot-licking majorettes. The Imam didn’t say if any woman had ever “consummated a date” with the Major, but my guess is that one look at his photograph might have been enough to make any woman clutch her burkha tightly around her body in self-defense.
And then of course, there was his age. 39 years old and never been kissed except for tongue-lashings from young boys and cleanly-shaven teenage “pearls.” Obviously lacking in any charm attractive to a woman unless she is a professional thief, guttersnipe, or has eight kids from five husbands, all dead from martyrious circumstances.
I think it much more likely that the social tightness of Army life just left him behind. Everyone knew he was a devout Muslim and that any conversation with him would lead inevitably to being hit on to read that boring book he always carried around. He never played poker at the Officer’s Club with the rest of the guys, speaking out on the evils of alcohol even more loudly than the guys from A.A. as they waved their Bibles and small bottles of Antabuse. When the weekends came, he got no invitations to backyard BBQ’s, even those serving nothing but beef, because he eschewed chewing haram food and most of his fellow officers’ wives simply did not want such a dorky looking guy in the house or even the back yard.
As for scoring with the female officers he worked with…let’s just say that women have an instinct not to get involved with quiet guys with a shaved head carrying a copy of the Koran everywhere.
As for hitting on his fellow male officers…Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell…please don’t ask again, I might puke.
And so, cut off from all possible “normal” relationships, the Major stewed in his own ample juices growing closer to Allah with each passing blonde, brunette, redhead, and army chrome-dome complaining that her boots were just right but still a bit stiff from the leavings of that last celebration in the BOQ’s communal shower.
The Major studied his pig-eared personal copy of the Koran that he had received as a high-school graduation gift from his favorite cousin, and saw a way to achieve his goal of more pussy than he could handle.
Jihad!!
There it was! right in the Holy Koran! No matter how many times he had sinned, how many people he had killed or victimized, no matter how many of his young male cousins he had raped, no matter how much crap he’d had to take from the Alla-damned US Army, no matter how many orders he’d taken from infidel Colonels, no matter how many women sneered at his porky beergut and wrinkled their noses at his halitosis…why he could even deny Allah and get away with it just by getting killed while making an honest effort to kill as many Kufr as he could get his hands on while believing that he was doing it all for Allah according to his beloved Koran.
It takes a very intelligent psychiatrist to discover this basic truth, or unremmiting diligence in reading the most confusing and boring scripture ever written.
Being the type that never takes precipitate action, the Major soberly reflected upon his intended course. Finally a light went off under his shiny pate. He realized that even if somehow he failed entrance to Jannah by somehow surviving his Jihad moment, he would still be set for life and never would have any worries about the common exegiencies so vexing to the rest of us, like rent, getting to work on time, and having to wear clothes when in public.
He saw that surviving his Mujahedeen Moment would only land him in the perpetual care of the US Military Justice system, protected from all outrageous circumstances by constitutionally-guaranteed rights from the najis infidels. He might have to spend a few days or weeks in a hospital because he took a solemn vow to Allah not to stop killing until he himself was killed or wounded, but that was really nothing more than a furlough on his back tended by sweet efficient hospital houris clad in nothing but freshly laundered crisp white uniforms making arousing rustling sounds against their fulsome bodies as they would move about his sumptiously-appointed hospital suite guarded by a three-man SWAT Team to prevent his premature assassination by revengeful white American bigots sent to kill him by the nefarious Neocons.
“Yes!” he fantasied, as he fondled his weapons, an FN 5.7, an heirloom Smith & Wesson .357, and his favorite, Mr Happy.
Yes! If I survive the ordeal, I will be set for life. At the Court Martial, I shall simply plead insanity brought on by the stress of being called “goat-fucker” by that terrible neighbor downstairs who “keyed” the side of my brand-new Geo Metro, Sgt Whatsisname, (funny, I’m usually so good at remembering trivia). I will show him I am not one to be dismissed as an abuser of fine young animals. It will be so easy to convince the Court Tribunal that I am insane. No doubt already, they believe that Muslims are blood-thirsty goons ready to strap on a suicide bombing belt at the drop of a durka. After all, I am also a state-certified psychiatrist. Who better to run rings around their specious legal accusations.
Even better, I am a Muslim Psychiatrist. Not only as Allah says, “Muslims are the best of people” but a psychiatrist familiar with all the twisted thinkings of the human mind and able to fake any and all symptoms of mental disease. I shall astound the generals of the Court Martial, with my lucid legal reasonings, confound them with broadsides of psychiatric symptoms, and reduce their military pride to dust with recountings of the shining victories of Muhammed during his pacification of the infidels and other polytheists.
The Major caught himself for a moment, “What if one of the tribunal judges is a Joo?” Simple, I shall run amok in the courtroom and make my way to Jannah. If the filthy infidels don’t kill me then, such an outburst must surely convince them that I am insane and therefore not legally responsible for my actions.
Then I shall be found to have a 100% service-connected disability and can then retire with full benefits at my present pay rate with full military medical benefits. Of course, they shall probably incarcerate me for the rest of my life, but when Islam takes over the US, I will receive a full pardon from President Hussein, and be reinstated in the US Army at the rank of Brigadier General and credited with the pay differential back to the date of my politically-inspired conviction.
It may take several years before I am rescued by my Muslim brothers from the ignominious imprisonment of the Infidel, but every day along the way, I shall continue and join in the Jihad by sending my entire military pension check to that nice Imam who helped me so much in my search for a devout Muslimah to marry.
It’s too bad that didn’t work out, but Jihad and taking as many of the infidel with me as possible is perhaps the best way, surely the only way to Jannah.
©2009 The foregoing is not meant to be taken seriously except as humorous satire and commentary on current events. It is protected as free speech under the guarantees given to the people of the United States of America by the Constitution, a contract between the people and the government limiting the powers of government and defining the rights the people reserve for and to themselves.
http://www.jihadwatch.org/2009/11/its-getting-harder-by-the-minute-to-say-he-just-snapped-fort-hood-jihadist-linked-to-911-jihadists.html#comments
:o
By memee November 7, 2009 at 8:37 pm
OBD—The US hanged over 200+ German subversives on US soil during WWII. These Germans were not in uniform and thus the Geneva Convention did not apply.
The terrorist detainees in Gitmo were also not in uniform and hence the Geneva Convention should not apply. They should be tried by the military courts as were the German subversives in WWII.
But then again we won WWII.
We
By rick November 8, 2009 at 3:12 pm
Damn memee, ya mean we understood the Geneva Convention and acted accordingly? Please say it ain’t so, why I can see the lefties already tearing up and ready to act out their dismay. Oh well, maybe obama will invite them to live in the big white house he shares with the rest of the love them regardless clowns. Thinking about it, how about they accidentally drown in one of those environmentally incorrect pig feces ponds? After all, it’s hard to tell one piece of feces from another….and speaking of Lindsey…..
By Heidi November 8, 2009 at 7:02 pm
*WHY I VOTED AS I DID*
GITMO detainees …
* … keep ‘em in Cuba (74%, 17 Votes)
* … send ‘em to Charleston, S.C. (26%, 6 Votes)**
Total Voters: 23
**SEND ‘EM TO US.
###
BECAUSE>>>
I know the Lord works in mysterious ways. There are folks here among many I have met that aren’t PC about taking somebody out and knowing how to make it look like an accident.
By Red November 9, 2009 at 10:48 am
Why are we so afraid to keep these suspects on U.S. soil? Do these detainees possess super human powers they will use to explode through our cell blocks? We have 2.3 million people behind bars in the U.S. I think we got the hang of it. What’s so hard about locking up a couple of hundred more in our prisons? We get the added advantage of having our military men gain some practice as to how to deal with this particular kind of suspected terrorists.
By Crooner November 9, 2009 at 1:18 pm
Ask our military commanders how they want the detainees treated.
And I agree: bring ‘em to the Navy Brig. Smells like jobs.
By Halftime November 9, 2009 at 3:41 pm
A few questions/points:
If we bring them here, must we afford them the same rights and priviledges afforded our ‘native soil’ inmates (visitation, phone calls, mail call, etc.)?
If they are tried in civilian courts and found ‘not guilty’ are we bound to release them into the community? If they are tried in military courts and found ‘not guilty’ what do we do with them then?
What jobs are created by keeping them in the Naval Brig? Wouldn’t you have to join the Navy to get that job?
Surely the detainees would have to be kept in solitary confinement 24/7 allowing them very little in the way of freedom of movement (else some wayward yet still very patriotic ex-military boys are gonna have ‘em some fun or these radicalized morons gain the ability to indoctrinate others). Once on American soil, can this be done legally?
Keep Gitmo open. This will just be one more in a long line of campaign promises that the Great One isn’t able to keep. And what’s one more?
By dirtbogger November 10, 2009 at 11:29 am
We are in two illeagal wars of aggression to control middle eastern resources, this is out lined in the PNAC report written prior to the 9-11
attacks http://www.newamericancentury.org/ why can we not have public trials for these men, is there something to hide? Torture does not extract intelligence, it extracts confessions! No plane hit building 7 on 9-11 but it fell symmetrically within its own foot print at the rate of gravity on 9-11! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Db2te1u8Dgs