Michael Jordan Is In The News

Quick … make sure your boss isn’t peeking over your shoulder.

In case you missed it – and judging from the TV ratings at Tahoe’s American Century Celebrity Golf Championship, most of you did – a giant inflatable penis made its way onto the course where former NBA star Michael Jordan, Cowboys QB Tony Romo and numerous other celebs were playing golf on Saturday.

It was all part of what we can only assume was the greatest bachelorette party in history.

Here’s the first-person account of what went down from inflatable penis participant “Elizabeth,” courtesy of Busted Coverage:

I was chased on the beach by a woman sherriff who told me to hand over the “inflatable penis”, this was AFTER the bachelorette, Sam, rushed MJ on the green with the inflatable penis.

MJ was hysterically laughing.

We ran back to where we were standing and a male cop was coming over to talk to us so the bachelorette handed it over to me and everyone started yelling “RUN” so I ran over to where MJ was putting and started to jump up and down.

That was the shot that you got and was on tv.

I guess the network called the sheriff to get that inflatable penis!!.

I went back over to where the bachelorette was and they told me to run away again because I was really being pursued and out of no where a woman cop starts chasing me, so I run down to the water to throw it in the water,and at this moment everyone on the beach is watching and yelling at me to throw it in the water!

So I do!!

I am soooo not a rebel but I was under pressure and the cop was like” I could arrest you for that” and I said oh please dont!

so she tells me to grab it out of the water and deflate it…which I start to do, but I am taking my time..and just as I was about to open the hole to let the air out a friend runs up to us and takes it from me and jumps in the water and swims back to the boat. !!

That was HILARIOUS.. SO the cop and I and another girl are just standing there and I apologize to her and tell her how good she looks with a gun and we walk back to heckle tony romo. I am married and it was my future sister in law’s bachelorette party.

Meanwhile back at the boat, where the rest of 24 girl bachelorette party was, harbor police comes up the to 5 boat barge and tells the girls that ”they might as well have a sign that says stupid bachelorette party ” and that we are all ” stupid dumb girls” all becuz of the inflatable penis” and that people have been calling in and complaining.

HE THREATEND to breathalize the people on the boat if we didnt deflate it. SO the girls ont he boat had to deflate it and by that time we had to return the boats to the rental place. We were the talk of the town.!

In case you were wondering, former MLB pitcher Rick Rhoden won the tournament, his eighth celebrity championship. He shot two over par for his final round. Our guess is that most of you are glossing over that info and going back to the part of Elizabeth’s story where she and the other girl are telling the girl cop “how good she looks with a gun.”

Wowzers.

Either that or you’re staring a little too intently at a giant inflatable penis.

It’s your imagination, people. We’re just here to give it flight …