Mande Is Writing A Book?

A few weeks ago we saw (and applied for) a job posting for a research assistant to an author working on a new book. We didn’t tell Sic Willie, of course, because he likes to think we’re stupid and plan on sticking around his little rat hole forever.

As if.

Interestingly enough, the posting turned out to be for our very own (we’re not possessive or anything) Mande, who has penned dozens of kick ass columns for FITS over the last few months.

Mande is writing a book?

“Yes, yes and more yes,” people.

What’s it about? Honestly, we don’t have a clue. And she’s not saying.

An incredulous Sic – initially taken aback by this development – quickly recovered his bearings and announced that it was a “Stalker Manifesto” in which Mande details her obsession with him and all the kinky sex she incessantly offers to provide him with.

Informed that such an explanation was “simply not plausible” (to put it kindly), Sic collapsed on the floor in the fetal position, crying “I’m losing her … I’m losing her …” and started sucking his fingers as he stared aimlessly out into space with a catatonic, brain-damaged look on his face.

True story.

Ever the jokester (at her own expense), Mande offered this explanation when reached by her fellow FITS gals for comment:

“What’s my book about? Hell if I know . . . it’s hard to tell with all those big words, snotty alliterations, and nested clauses,” she said.

Needless to say, this is gonna be one fun read …

UPDATE - “Mande Wilkes Book” is indeed two letters away from being a famouse assassin, DJ. Good point there, you speller, you.

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