Eff MSNBC

The other FITS girls write a lot about the death of “old media” and about why it is dying. Sic Willie probably puts them up to it, so that he can plug “new media,” and by extension this here web site.

Genius, right?

Today, MSNBC teaches us that “new media” is not immune to insipid news coverage.

I’m referring to the article artfully entitled “Recession F-bombs: Why swearing feels great,” in which a certain – and certainly burnt-out – Diane Mapes reports on the recessionary upswing in curse word usage:

According to Los Angeles psychotherapist Nancy Irwin, a foul economy is prompting more outbursts of foul language.

“There are a lot of elements that are out of our control right now and as a result, there’s a lot more frustration, a lot more fear and anxiety,” she says. “When people feel that, many cuss. Swearing is something that gives us an instantaneous release.”

Besides the oh-so-appropriate WTF-ness of the article, the bigger issue may be why every single thing must necessarily be traced to the economy.

The recession has provided us with the ultimate excuse – multipurpose and ubiquitous … like the credit cards that got us here, it’s “everywhere you want to be.” Now it’s an excuse for people’s potty mouths, the reasoning of which is something along the lines of “portfolio peeks inspire cursing.”

That’s what they in statistics call a spurious correlation.

And speaking of statistics, there’s a bounty in Ms. Mapes’ article. She even breaks down the ratio of Twittered curse words to non-curse words!

The second-best part of the article is when Mapes reports on “healthy ways to cope with” your stock portfolio.

The best part?

This pornified gem:

Dan Gersten, 62, a marketing research consultant from Los Angeles, says the occasional short sharp exclamation simply feels satisfying to him.

“It’s a burst,” he says. “It’s quick and it’s over and it’s a great release. It’s like popping a bottle of soda that’s shaken up too hard. Everything needs a release.”

It’s quite possible that Ms. Mapes found that quote somewhere and built an ostensibly legit story around it just so she could use it.

After all, that’s kind of what I just did.

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