Put A “Cone Of Silence” On Religious Debate

For those of you who haven’t been paying attention lately, America’s economy is in the middle of a government-induced, politician-exacerbated nosedive that has already cost us $2.6 trillion in taxpayer money that we don’t even have to “fix.”

Except all those bailouts, loan guarantees and Constitution-shredding socialist interventions haven’t fixed anything.

In fact, things have only gotten worse as Washington politicians of both parties contemplate the next multi-billion dollar “rescue plan,” an increasingly common display of bipartisanshit that once again aims to demolish capitalism in order to save it from itself.

Against such a backdrop, we’ll be brutally honest - the fact that some overweight white dude who wrote an utterly meaningless book full of proverbial platitudes is (gasp) opposed to gay marriage doesn’t concern us all that much.

Oh wait … fatty is dispensing his hackneyed “wisdom” at the historic inauguration of “The One,” you say?

Really? You’re kidding … we’re permitting the spread of his innocuous, non-denominational pablum at what should be a celebration of how we’ve truly overcome such “religious” interference in our lives?

Yeah, we’re sorry … you’ll have to forgive us for being incapable of manufacturing any outrage one way or the other on this one.

Let’s try and gain a little perspective on this whole Rick Warren mess, shall we?

Specifically, let’s look at this thing from “The One’s” perspective.

In addition to proposing an education plan that does absolutely nothing to fix our “dead in the water” education system (well, beyond the proven ineffective method of spending a sh*t-ton of new money) President-elect Barack Obama just appointed a guy to implement his ‘mo money program who by all accounts is a homosexual liberal’s wet dream.

Seriously, Obama’s Education Secretary nominee Arne Duncan actually pitched a plan that would spend taxpayer dollars to create a “Pride Campus” at the Social Justice Solidarity High School in Chicagoland.

And no, we didn’t just make up the name “Social Justice Solidarity High School” to get a rise out of anybody.

Amazing, it’s a real school right here in the United States of Whatever The Hell We Are These Days, and its new Pride Campus would be a “haven for gay youth seeking refuge from sometimes hostile traditional classrooms.”

Sounds like equality in reverse for the sake of feeling good about our elevated tolerance level, if you ask us.

Which of course you did.

Anyway, as ridiculous as all of this is, the rabid left of Daily Kos addicts and Bill Ayers apologists are literally fuming at Obama, who we’re not entirely convinced didn’t manufacture this whole “scandal” to achieve a specific, desired outcome.

Sure, Obama bookended the controversial Rick Warren with a black civil rights pastor who has openly called for the ordination of gay clergy and the adoption of same-sex marriages, but nobody on the far left or the far right seems to have noticed the inclusion of Rev. Joseph Lowery.

And when you get right down to it, why wouldn’t Obama want to drop some of his seemingly limitless political capital to appease huge swaths of lily-white evangelicals who are dumb enough to believe that a pastor giving a prayer at glorified national pep rally actually “gets them something?”

Come on … do these people think for a minute he’s going to drop the “J” word?

What a tragically gullible country we live in.

Here’s the straight dope, folks …

Gay people shouldn’t be bullied at school, or anywhere, for that matter - and the assholes who bully them should be punished and expelled, if necessary. And not because their victims are gay - but because their victims are people.

Should gay people get married? We don’t think so, but we also don’t think they should be denied benefits on the basis of sexual orientation.

We already spend enough tax money seperating people, we ought to be focused on how to spend less of it so that all people can keep more of it, whatever they look like or believe or whoever they find themselves atttracted to behind closed doors.

Similarly, unoriginal overweight white pastors shouldn’t be villified for being invited to pray to God at a pep rally for a nation which, the last time we checked, was still “under God” and ostensibly still “trusts” in him - at least insofar as the tiny little “In God We Trust” notation on all of that new money the government is printing for us these days.

Of course, it certainly stands to reason that having effectively eradicated capitalism in this country, God probably won’t be holding out much longer.

And who can blame him?

We’ve got big problems in this country, people. And a bipartisan dearth of solutions.

And believe us, anybody on the far left or right who’s worried about Rick Warren speaking at Barack Obama’s inauguration is utterly tone deaf - both as to what’s wrong and how we should go about truly “fixing” it.

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