Angelina Is Still Hotter
Well, there’s Jennifer Aniston, b-b-buck nekkid with the exception of a poorly-placed necktie.
And no, you can’t get rid of the necktie by rubbing your thumb over your monitor … cause we tried that already. Many, many times, in fact.
Anyway, let’s start with the obvious … she looks good.
In fact, she looks “real good” as a friend of a friend from Inman, S.C. would say.
And not that we’ve ever been inordinately focused on Jennifer Aniston’s boobs, but we definitely like this shapeage better than what we saw on that totally topless – and thus NSFW – video of her walking down some Mexican beach a few years back.
She’s put some meat on them bones, which is a good thing …
But the question still stands – does she even hold a candle to Angelina? The woman she loathes? The woman about whom she vented a bit more of her spleen in this GQ exclusive?
Short answer? No.
And not to get all fortune cookie on y’all, but green isn’t a good color on anybody … especially when the green is jealousy.
We’re not sure how long it’s been since Brad Pitt broke Jen’s heart, but we’re pretty sure Nixon was in the White House and “Hey Mr. Tambourine Man” was on Top 40 radio.
Which is to say get over it, Jen … and not via loveless rebounds with Vince Vaughn and John Mayer.
Learning to love yourself? That’s right. It’s still the greatest love of all.