Islamisbad
Terrorists packing rocket-propelled grenades, automatic machine guns and a car bomb attacked the U.S. Embassy in Yemen today, killing ten Yemeni civilians as well as six of the “martyrs.” No Americans were harmed.
U.S. authorities were quick to note that the attack bore all the markings of Osama bin Laden’s al Queda organization, although a group called Islamic Jihad claimed responsibility.
Wait … wasn’t that the name of the terrorist group in the movie True Lies?
Anyway, in the good old days America would immediately launch a couple of fighter jets from an aircraft carrier and pound the hell out of somebody, somewhere.
Seriously, we’ve got all the technology and all the military might in the world and we can’t figure out where these rag head bastards are hiding out and dispatch them from face of the planet? Like, with “extreme prejudice” or something cool-sounding like that?
Until America’s “intelligence” ceases to be an exercise in oxymoronisitude, we continue to believe that random bombings of areas known to be sympathetic to these terrorists is a great idea.
And by random bombings, we really mean carpet bombings. Then we’d drop leaflets afterward to the four people who survived saying “that’s right, beeyatches” in Arabic, with a disclaimer that any future attacks against America would be met with even harsher retaliatory measures.
Finally, we’d put smiley faces on our leaflets and encourage the recipients to “have a nice day, Beavis.”
Look, we’ve got radicals in America, people. But they generally confine their activities to being gay, not showering much and raising millions of dollars for Barack Obama.
They don’t kill people – just common sense, fiscal restraint and any shred of individual responsibility.
Yet Americans of all stripes paid the price for their appeasement of these jihadist SOB’s … so why shouldn’t it be the same for countries that already hate us anyway? Countries where the “radicals” love killing people the same way we love Viagra and high-definition TV sets?
Frankly, why we haven’t already dropped a nuke on Mecca during the Hajj pilgrimage is beyond us.
Comments
By T4 on September 17th, 2008 at 2:59 pm
Great comment about the radicals in the U.S. Hilarious!
By Seriously? on September 17th, 2008 at 3:14 pm
“Look, we’ve got radicals in America, people. But they generally confine their activities to being gay, not showering much and raising millions of dollars for Barack Obama. They don’t kill people – just common sense, fiscal restraint and any shred of individual responsibility.”
Was that supposed to be a joke? Corporate bailouts= individual responsibility? Record budget deficits & national debt= fiscal restraint?
By HP on September 17th, 2008 at 6:14 pm
Why, I don’t know. But this tuneage seems especially appropo this evening:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wqb5Vllh9K4
…………………..
P.S. Youtube is going to go about some scheduled maintenance @ “around” 6 P — California time. Doesn’t that sound like a bunch of surfer dudes that think they rule the planet?
By piepton on September 18th, 2008 at 12:22 am
“Look, we’ve got radicals in America, people”
Yeah, like people who would retaliate to an act by a few individuals with carbet bombing on an entire population.
Who gives a rat’s ass about Yemenis killing other Yemenis? This story should be about the fact that the Bush administration continues to blame everything on al Qaeda even when random fictional characters from Schwarzenegger movies take credit.