The Angry Loon Is Back

… AND MADDER THAN EVER

FITSNews - August 22, 2008 - We ordinarily make it a rule not to hand out free press to unruly loons, but in the case of our newest online anti-admirer, we are compelled to make a final solution … err, exception.

Wait … why the inappropriate Holocaust joke?

Well, after thoroughly “out-Goebbelsing” this latest status quo apologist a week ago, a deafening totalitarian silence was finally broken yesterday with some fresh venom directed at our own Sic Willie. While predictably ignoring all of the issues we raised, a clever implication was made that our founding editor has, um, how do we put this … a tiny penis. It would also appear that our website’s growing popularity and “slickness with the diction” has struck a bit of a nerve …

Anyway, from our new hater:

The only reason Folks’ blog is ranked so high is because 1) he’s been blogging since he got canned for pleading guilty to criminal domestic violence and 2) he’s still got enough frenemies in this festering industry called politics that feed him information …

So, yeah, Will, you’ve got a lot of hits. A monkey could get a lot of hits if it blogged consistently, on the same topic, for three years. That’s how blog readership works. A monkey would probably not throw as much of its own shit and wank off in public a little less, but you can’t have everything.

First of all, don’t knock wanking off in public or tossing your own feces ’till you’ve tried it. Both are actually quite liberating. Second, the last thing this world needs is someone leveling the “small penis” accusation at someone as demonstrably crazy as Sic. He’s liable to not only post a picture of it, but provide a list of all those who can vouch for its imposing dimensions.