Coldplay Likes Boobs

SHOCKING, WE KNOW

FITSNews - July 2, 2008 - While it’s typically not surprising to hear of men liking breasts, the fact that Coldplay’s Chris Martin says he likes them just doesn’t seem quite right to us. Maybe it’s the fact that he sings like a little girl. Or maybe it’s the fact he’s married to Gwyneth Paltrow, which is a lot like being married to one of those branches that ends up in your driveway after a thunderstorm.

Anyway, not that we care, here’s Martin’s case for boobies:

COLDPLAY star CHRIS MARTIN has revealed he used to worry he might be gay — until he realised he loved BOOBS.

Chris, married to Hollywood beauty GWYNETH PALTROW, fretted about his sexuality in his teens because a strict Christian upbringing made him think sex was wrong.

The 31-year-old told Rolling Stone magazine: “What I grew up with was, if you even think about boobs, you’re going to hell.

“It was drilled in — they’re wrong.”

“But let’s face it, they’re fantastic.”

We did some independent research on this question and were able to confirm that boobs are, in fact, “fantastic.” In fact, they’re so fantastic that our founding editor Sic Willie frequently gripes about being the only member of our staff who doesn’t have a pair of his own to play with … although he’s certainly working on it.

Yup, boobs are fabulous. In fact, we’re going to fondle ours right now just for the hell of it.

Comments

By Whew...that was close. on July 2nd, 2008 at 3:00 pm

I thought I was gay once too. Then I realized that I just loved hairy man a**.

By Nadinamour on July 2nd, 2008 at 7:14 pm

Thank you Chris for this honest comment reminding us once again that our puritanical society is damaging to the sexuality of children “if you think of boobs… you go to hell” Whaow! pretty powerful ! I am glad that you overcame your personal sexual guilt and are having a very playful life! So to continue celebrating boobs without guilt, gotopless.org is organizing a National gotopless day on Aug 23rd! It is aimed at legally ending once and for all this female nipplephobia thanks to our US constitution (Read legal argument on our website as well as enjoy the nice pix!)
For more info on this joyful gotopless event, go to http://www.gotopless.org. Hope to see you both there, Chris and Gwyneth !
Nadinamour
Gotopless.org National event coordinator