fat-kids

Pay Attention, Fat People

NOW YOU’RE CAUSING GLOBAL WARMING, TOO

By Mande Wilkes

FITSNews – May 27, 2008 – Unsatisfied with blaming fat people for high healthcare costs, awkward air travel, and the general decline of the nation, researchers have now pegged global warming on the obese. It’s a happy day for liberals everywhere … finally, they can talk about their two biggest concerns not as separate issues but as a single, linked dilemma. Phil Edwards, part of the research team, is representative of the hysteria:

“We are all becoming heavier and it is a global responsibility. Obesity is a key part of the big picture.”

This apparent correlation gives certain people just the excuse they need to lecture the rest of us, and we can almost feel the guilt-tripping about to reach a fever pitch. Basically, if you’re eating a cheeseburger, you’re not only hastening your own slow demise, you’re also causing eternal planetary doom.

Edwards and his team attribute their findings to the increased fuel required to transport fat people. Also, researchers concluded that the obese use more agricultural resources because they … you guessed it, eat more.  Huh … we never would’ve guessed that …

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