Woo Yee Haw

VRRROOM, VRRROOM

FITSNews – February 18, 2008 – So some guy we’ve never heard of before (i.e. someone whose name is not Jeff Gordon) won the Daytona 500 yesterday, which in the event you enjoy watching cars go ’round and ’round in circles for hours on end is probably pretty exciting news. Of course, there was also that time you found a KC Masterpiece potato chip in between your sofa cushions, which was pretty damn exciting, too. Not to mention delicious.

Anyway, since we really are such huge Motor Sports fans here at FITSNews, we can tell you that yesterday’s win at Daytona was the first-ever for car owner Roger Penske, although he is a fourteen-time Indianapolis 500 winner (editor’s note: which is faggoty, your-a-peein’ style racin’).

We can also tell you that just because a potato chip has been collecting butt fumes in your sofa since the Carter administration, ‘taint nuttin wrong with eatin’ it, people.