Megan Fox Might Date You
TRANSFORMERS STAR IS A BIT ON THE GEEKY SIDE
FITSNews - February 12, 2008 - Ever since Angelina Jolie got her famous Sic Willie tattoo, there’s been a rash of Hollywood body art devoted to South Carolina’s resident bad boy. Unfortunately, Transformers’ star Megan Fox is one of the few Tinseltown A-Listers who has yet to permanently adorn her flesh in tribute to our founding editor. To which we can only say WTF, Megan?
Tragically, it turns out Fox is a date-desperate dork, and has the sort of body ink that only gets you hot if you also happen to be a date-desperate dork. From the pages of our secret addiction, Shakespeare Geek:
I’m not sure I’ve seen any of Megan Fox’s movies, but I can appreciate a hot girl with a King Lear tattoo! Apparently she’s most recently seen in The Transformers, which I haven’t seen yet.
Her tattoo (the link above is totally SFW, by the way) says “We will all laugh at gilded butterflies,” and comes from King Lear, Act V, scene 3.
Uhhh … hold on … WHAT?!? “We all laugh at gilded butterflies???” Holy hell. What is this chick’s definition of foreplay - braces, bifocals and an asthma inhaler followed by a couple quick games of Yahtzee?
Look, people. We’re not at all embarassed to admit that we have no idea what “gilded” means (something Glenn Close wore in the 1800’s, perhaps?), but frankly this isn’t the sort of body art that’s going to go over well during doggy-style.
Megan, Megan, Megan … you might as well have tattooed “wait, my chastity belt’s still locked” on your back.
Anyway, since there’s no way this post could possibly get any gayer, we thought we’d share the modus operandi of Fox’s New No. 1 Fan with you:
Shakespeare may have died 400 or so years ago, so how come he keeps showing up everywhere I turn my head? From movie and book reviews to trivia and quizzes, we discuss anything and everything Shakespeare we can get our hands on.
Uh, did we mention this guy hasn’t seen Transformers yet?
It’s sad what society is coming to today, people. Sad, sad, sad …
Comments
By Wow on February 12th, 2008 at 10:59 am
she screwed it up, according to this source:
KING LEAR:
No, no, no, no! Come, let’s away to prison:
We two alone will sing like birds i’ the cage:
When thou dost ask me blessing, I’ll kneel down,
And ask of thee forgiveness: so we’ll live,
And pray, and sing, and tell old tales, and laugh
At gilded butterflies, and hear poor rogues
Talk of court news; and we’ll talk with them too,
Who loses and who wins; who’s in, who’s out;
And take upon’s the mystery of things,
As if we were God’s spies: and we’ll wear out,
In a wall’d prison, packs and sects of great ones,
That ebb and flow by the moon.
By Darrell Jenkins on February 12th, 2008 at 11:36 am
I’d put her in the “gilded butterfly”. Might follow that up with a baked chicken or possibly a donkey punch. We’ll just plat it by ear, see what happens.
By jared fogle on February 12th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
did u actually expect someone that good looking to grasp billy shake hahah i didnt
By hee hee on February 12th, 2008 at 12:54 pm
Never heard of the baked chicken. And I thought I had heard them all.
By ShakespeareGeek on February 13th, 2008 at 3:33 am
Hey now, that link is several months old. Still haven’t seen Transformers, but I’m just sayin’, ya know? I resemble some of those remarks
By James on June 12th, 2008 at 11:03 pm
i dont care what anyone says, i would do anything to take megan fox on a date, so megan if your reading this you need to email me….
By Mitch on June 17th, 2008 at 4:56 pm
wow, if i had the shot to go on a date with megan fox thier would be no stopin it.
By DOUBLE D on July 22nd, 2008 at 8:40 pm
IF I HAD THE SHOT TO GO ON A DATE WITH MEGAN MY LIFE WOULD BE COMPLETE AND I WOULD TAKE HER ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD BECAUSE SHE SEEMS LIKE THE MOST COOLEST AND SHE IS LIKE ONE OF THE HOTTEST GIRLS I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!!!
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