SC Politics ‘07: Year Of The Monkey (Business)

SCANDALS WERE EVERYWHERE YOU LOOKED IN PALMETTO POLITICS THIS YEAR

FITSNews – December 31, 2007 – As we head off to shoot fireworks at people during tonight’s New Year’s Eve celebration, we figured the only annual awards anybody deserved in South Carolina politics this year were those commemorating scandalous behavior. Because scandals are about the only thing our “leaders” got done this year, people.

Seriously, we know 2004 was technically the “Year of the Monkey,” but 2007 was without a doubt the “Year of the Monkey Business” here in the Palmetto State.

So … imagining a nice John Bonham drumroll, here are the top five scandals of the year (thankfully) gone by …

5. EDUCATION COMPETITIVE GRANTS

This story is bound to have legs longer than these, particularly when Republicans realize that the state’s Democratic superintendent has been shoveling ”school choice” money into the districts of his key legislative allies, and the peones who work for him have been manipulating the grant process to do so. 

4. THE PERSONAL INJURY LAWYER CAUCUS

It must be nice to rake in millions of dollars in legal fees while writing the laws that govern your profession. In fact, it must be very nice. Of course the party could be nearing an end for some of these jokers.

3. BEATTYGATE

Powerful State Rep. Harry Cato has staked his Speakership on engineering the election of a liberal Democrat to the State Supreme Court. Now he’s hoping that the Black Caucus will hold behind him this year as he continues his effort to veer the SCGOP slightly to the left of Karl Marx. Of course, no matter what the party labels say, we all know who’s really in charge over at the S.C. State House.

2. SUPREME COURT BAR EXAM FLAP

This scandal is No. 2 with a bullet, and probably should have been No. 1 given the fact that it involves powerful people’s daughters getting the benefit of the State Supreme Court’s, um, benevolence. It also happens to be another FITSNews original that created a veritable sh*tstorm of mainstream media coverage as well as proposed legislative changes.

Oh, and welcome to our radar screen, Madame Chief Justice. We think you’ll like it here …

1. S.C. COMPETITIVE GRANTS PROGRAM

Legislators are proposing to do away with this slush fund next session after we broke it open like a piñata back in March, although it remains to be seen whether the real “juice” of this story (allegations of improper vote-trading on the Senate floor) will ever see the light of day. We know the Godfather of Pork is hoping he can keep more than a few people quiet on that particular point …

Anyway, the “Best Little (Taxpayer-Funded) Whorehouse In South Carolina” reopens for business a week from tomorrow, and you can count on FITSNews to continue kicking ass, taking names and pissing off all the right people.

Love us or hate us, it’s just how we roll, baby!

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