SC Politics ‘07: Year Of The Monkey (Business) December 31, 2007
Posted by fitsnews in : SC Politics , 1 comment so far
SCANDALS WERE EVERYWHERE YOU LOOKED IN PALMETTO POLITICS THIS YEAR
FITSNews - December 31, 2007 - As we head off to shoot fireworks at people during tonight’s New Year’s Eve celebration, we figured the only annual awards anybody deserved in South Carolina politics this year were those commemorating scandalous behavior. Because scandals are about the only thing our “leaders” got done this year, people.
Seriously, we know 2004 was technically the “Year of the Monkey,” but 2007 was without a doubt the “Year of the Monkey Business” here in the Palmetto State.
So … imagining a nice John Bonham drumroll, here are the top five scandals of the year (thankfully) gone by … (more…)
Who’s Going To Beat Tom Brady & The Patriots?
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PROBABLY NOBODY, BUT THE COLTS ARE THE ONLY TEAM WITH A REAL SHOT
FITSNews - December 31, 2007 - If top NFL prognosticators are to be believed, the only hope of dashing the New England Patriots‘ relentless pursuit of perfection lies with Peyton Manning and the defending Super Bowl Champion Indianapolis Colts.
True, it’s not a very realistic hope given how special (editor’s note: vomit) this year’s New England team is, but here are the odds on who could potentially supplant potty-mouth Tom Brady & Co. atop the NFL postseason mountain:
INDIANAPOLIS: 2 to 1
SAN DIEGO: 10 to 1
JACKSONVILLE: 20 to 1
PITTSBURGH: 25 to 1
TENNESSEE: 70 to 1
Clearly, New England is the favorite to capture its fourth Super Bowl in the last seven years, and the team’s 16-0 record means that Manning and the Colts would have to upset them in Foxboro, where they have never won in January. At 13-3, the Colts are actually better than they were last season despite losing future Hall-of-Famer Marvin Harrison for 11 games and Pro Bowl defensive end Dwight Freeney for 6 games. Harrison should be back for a potential Foxboro showdown, but Freeney is done for the year with a broken foot.
Heidi Montag Not Engaged, But Still Dating Cake Boy
Posted by fitsnews in : Pop Culture , 1 comment so far
THESE TWO AREN’T FOOLING ANYBODY
FITSNews - December 31, 2007 - We keep going back and forth on The Hills, um, “actress” Heidi Montag. We know she’s hot, we’re just not sure whether fake lips and fake tits are worth dying for or not. Currently, we’re going with “yes,” although purely for Sic Willie’s benefit. Lord knows it better be for somebody else, because when you’ve got more snakes in your head than Medusa a bunch of artificial puffiness probably isn’t going to do much to improve your self-esteem.
Come to think of it, that makes plastic surgery a lot like marriage, which it appears Miss Montag is ditching the notion of … at least temporarily.
Of course when your prospective hubby is being offered gay porn roles, a little “cause for pause” is probably warranted.
You Scratch My Back …
Posted by fitsnews in : SC Politics , 15 comments
ANOTHER COZY S.C. POLITICAL RELATIONSHIP FOILS REAL REFORM
FITSNews - December 31, 2007 - We wrote the other day about a federal judge up in Anderson County, S.C. who issued a temporary injunction that prohibits the state’s workers’ compensation commissioners from following the law and using objective standards to settle claims that come before them. And while we were shocked to discover that anybody could read in Anderson County, let alone write a legal opinion, it turns out U.S. District Court Judge G. Ross Anderson can do both.
Amazing, we know.
Of course what’s not amazing is that Judge Anderson’s temporary injunction seems to be rooted in a recurring political theme, one that (sadly) has become about as common in South Carolina as Kudzu in the summertime. Specifically, we’re talking about the existence of a cozy, personal relationship that calls into question the objectivity of an “official decision.”
As it turns out, Kathryn Williams, the Greenville personal injury lawyer who filed the injunction that Judge Anderson granted, used to clerk for … wait for it … Judge Anderson. On top of that, apparently the two of them continue to be “quite good friends” in the words of one judicial official who spoke with FITSNews on the condition of anonymity. (more…)
Sic Willie’s A Weiner! December 30, 2007
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ACTUALLY NO HE’S NOT, THAT’S KYLE ORTON OF DA BEARS
FITSNews - December 30, 2007 - It looks like “Da Bears” aren’t going to the playoffs this year, but don’t blame Sic Willie, who was 10-5 as a starter in 2005 and has won two of three games this year since retaking the reins of the Chicago offense.
Of course as much as Sic wishes he was this classy guy, the truth is he’s not an NFL quarterback … and certainly not one with a career 61.3 passer rating.
To put that number in perspective, imagine your grandmother starting an NFL game (she can be dead or alive) and 61.3 would still be a ridiculously sh*tty rating. In case you were wondering, the single season passer rating record of 121.1 is held by Peyton Manning.
Echo Chamber - Eight Years Later, The Truth
Posted by fitsnews in : Presidential Politics, SC Politics , 25 comments
STARTLING ADMISSION FROM TOMPKINS’ UNDERLING FINALLY COMES TO LIGHT
FITSNews - December 30, 2007 - The inauguration of George W. Bush as our nation’s 43rd President never would have happened were it not for a brutal, three-day blitzkrieg of negative campaigning that took place right here in South Carolina eight years ago. Fresh off of a stunning double-digit victory in New Hampshire, Arizona Senator John McCain came to the Palmetto State in 2000 looking to wrestle the GOP nomination from then-Governor Bush, whose previously high-flying campaign had badly foundered.
We all know what happened next - a sleazy character assassination launched by shadowy anonymous mailings and secret push-polls that villified McCain and delivered the state (and the Republican nomination) to Bush.
There’s never been much doubt that the “gutting” of John McCain (more on that specific word choice in a moment) was carefully-orchestrated by Bush’s South Carolina campaign team, led by consultant J. Warren Tompkins, although neither the veteran operative nor any of his underlings have ever owned up to it on the record.
Or … have they? (more…)
Charlie Wilson’s War December 29, 2007
Posted by fitsnews in : Pop Culture, US Politics , 2 comments
SORKIN’S LATEST SCRIPT ELEVATES UNCONVENTIONAL WAR DRAMA
FITSNews - December 29, 2007 - If the abysmal box office failure of recent politically-themed war dramas tells us anything, it’s that Americans don’t appreciate Hollywood trying to shove its world view down our throats. The left coast liberal elites don’t like war, nor do they particularly approve of the ideologue hawks who pursue it. We get that.
Fortunately for those of us who appreciate a little wit, intelligence and irony interspersed with our brainwashing, we have Aaron Sorkin, the creative force behind television’s The West Wing and the latest poli-war film to hit the big screen, Charlie Wilson’s War.
Despite receiving mildly-favorable reviews from fans and critics alike, Charlie Wilson’s War is one of the best films we’ve seen recently, thanks in large measure to Sorkin’s screenwriting genius and the remarkable on-screen chemistry between actors Tom Hanks and Phillip Seymour Hoffman. In fact, only a lifeless performance by Julia Roberts holds the film back, in our humble estimation.
Charlie Wilson’s War centers around the covert involvement of the American government (well, the involvement of one hard-drinking, womanizing Congressman, anyway) on behalf of the Afghan Mujahideen, who successfully resisted a full-scale Soviet invasion of their country in the 1980’s. (more…)
