Paris Is An Inventor

A NOBEL PRIZE IS DEFINITELY ON THE HORIZON

FITSNews – October 30, 2007 – We’re not 100% sure, but it certainly appears that Paris Hilton has mastered the technology associated with attaching a dildo to a Vodka bottle, thus satisfying her two most basic needs in one handy dandy carry-along. You can view the full picture here, assuming of course you’re one of those gullible people who doesn’t believe that STD’s can be contracted through the Internet.

We’re not gullible, nor are we presumptuous enough to know where the “portable alcoholic dildo” ranks in the pantheon of human discovery. Our guess is it would be somewhere between the polio vaccine and silent velcro. Which would mean as inventors go, Paris is somewhere between Jonas Salk and that kid in the movie Garden State who invented silent velcro.

Nobel prize-worthy? You better believe it, people.

Comments