THIRD RELEASE IN A MONTH HAS SOME THINKING GRAMMY NOMINATION
FITSNews – September 20, 2007 – According to a not-so-informative news source, terrorist mastermind Osama Bin Laden has released a new video in which he says that his al Queda network is declaring war on the president of Pakistan. The video is the third release in less than a month from Bin Laden, which reminded us of that time back in the ’80′s when Wham! put out like five videos in a week or something – one of which was “Wake Me Up (Before You Go-Go),” we’re pretty sure. And maybe it wasn’t five in a week, but that’s what it felt like.
Anyway, apparently al Queda is using the sixth anniversary of the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks to launch a major PR drive, and of course the American media is playing right along and giving them beaucoup coverage. Nevermind that it’s the same old serpent and dragon crap about what a bunch of baby-killing infidels we are, and that Allah hates us for raping something or the other and that P.S. we’re all going to go straight to hell … very shortly. That’s the first part of the story, the second part of the story is that a bunch of government spooks with runny noses and fancy ID badges are working around the clock at undisclosed, underground locations to “analyze” the videos.
Jeez. The fact that this guy is still alive pretty much sums up how thoroughly America is getting its ass kicked in the so-called “War on Terror.” How we can photograph a fly on a donkey’s ass in Siberia from outer space and send a cruise missile there within five minutes yet fail to locate this mass-murderering attention whore is beyond us. We’re guessing Ron Paul’s supporters probably have some deep thoughts on this, which hopefully they’ll be willing to share with us once they’ve finished consuming their daily meds over milk and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.