Hooked on Phonics – Governor’s Edition

By fitsnews • on August 25, 2007
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sanford drowning

PICTURES OF LEGISLATORS WILL HELP HIM IDENTIFY THEM AT EVENTS

FITSNews – August 25, 2007 – Earlier this year, State Sen. John Courson was kind enough to send the staff here at FITSNews a personally autographed copy of the 2007 Legislative Manual.

An “insider phone book” complete with pictures, brief biographies and contact information for each State Senator and Representative, the manual helps lobbyists (but apparently not Gov. Mark Sanford) identify the 170 members of the General Assembly.

Last night in Greenville, S.C., the governor had a mid-conversation “brain freeze” as he failed to remember the name of one of his closest legislative allies, State Rep. Nathan Ballentine following a GOP legislative reception. It’s not the first time Sanford has muffed remembering the names of his friends, as he’s publicly referred to State Rep. Mick Mulvaney as “Nick Mulraney” and State Rep. Kit Spires as “Ken” Spires in the past.

Frankly, we understand the governor’s predicament. To be perfectly honest, the vast majority of Republican legislators aren’t worth remembering (especially the big-spending RINO’s currently running the show). Hell, as far as we’re concerned State Rep. Joan Brady might as well be Democratic Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi – except a little more liberal. We also understand State Rep. Michael Thomspon is often mistaken for a donkey, which probably isn’t surprising given his voting record.

But Ballentine, Mulvaney and Spires are all good fiscal conservatives, and are among the few legislative allies Sanford has in Columbia. It’d probably be a good idea if he at least got their names right.

In an effort to help, we’ve actually taken the liberty of printing up “gubernatorial flash cards” for Sanford, big blow-up pictures of all 170 legislators that his staff can use to help him figure out who’s who. It’ll be a lot like “Hooked on Phonics,” except without all the lions, tigers and giraffes.

Go on governor, sound it out …

Comments

By Mnemonic D. Vice on August 25th, 2007 at 4:54 pm

In all fairness, I heard this happened to Bruce Bannister, not Nathan Ballentine.

No, wait, maybe I’ve got that one wrong.

Never mind.

By Believe It Not on August 25th, 2007 at 5:53 pm

Hey, Will, were you there? Did you witness this event? A little more background would help us understand what significance, if any, this has on anything. How about some details on what happened?

Like, where did this happen? Who was he talking to? What were they talking about? Were you there? If so, what were you drinking, and did you have a designated driver for your trip home?

By anonymous on August 25th, 2007 at 6:49 pm

Michael Thompson is a jack-ass, not a donkey. What has he ever done for us good folk here in Anderson? Not much. He is a Gresham Barrett wantabe, but not coming anywhere close.

He wants to be Congressman Thompson. We had another non-married congressman in the third district. We didn’t like him either. Now he is a Senator, still don’t like the buzzard. Thompson may have the money, but not the brains or charisma to become our congressman.

By Willson on August 25th, 2007 at 8:03 pm

This reminds me of the shortest book I ever read…”The Legislative Friends of Mark Sanford”.

Not to be confused with one of the longest books I ever read…
“Former Friends of Mark Sanford”. The unabridged edition includes photos of the double crossed and scorned.

And then there is the much foretold….”The Taming of the Shrew: The Jenny Edition”. Which I believe debuts the week before “The Mark Sanford Story: Lose, Lose, Lose…but still feel like a winner!” With chapters on how to purchase the best tanning beds, how to turn any situation into a loser, and the proper way to leak the dirt on your opponents, it promises to be a breezy read through the fun and frolic of the life of a man that was once thought to have promise.

By G.L. on August 26th, 2007 at 1:12 am

I think if you look at Thompson’s record, he’s much more consistently conservative than most of the Republican House members. He’s also a very nice guy.

By Big D on August 27th, 2007 at 12:12 am

I would almost think that was Chris Pracht talking about Michael Thompson that way… talk about a blast from the past.

And Willson, I agree wholeheartedly with your post…

Will, this is about two weeks old– I had Fausto Carmona, and traded his ass with John Maine for Cole Hamels. Now Hamels is out through the playoffs, and Carmona is pitching lights out. But Maine still blows…

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