WOULD YOU LEAVE A CHILD WITH THESE, UM, MEN? FITSNews - July 23, 2007 - For reasons surpassing understanding, a gorgeous four-month old baby boy was left in the care of Sic Willie and his cousin Andrew Folks this morning. It might as well have been coated with honey and tossed into a bear cave. Believe
Read story »Archive for July, 2007
‘The State’ Is Not Really The State Anymore
NEWSPAPER'S MARKET RETREAT LEAVES CUSTOMERS IN LIMBO FITSNews - July 22, 2007 - For three decades, Lancaster County homebuilder Ross Gload would wake up each morning at quarter of six and make the long trek down the driveway to retrieve his copy of The State newspaper. "It was just me, my coffee and
Read story »Nothing Could Be Finer
SOAKING IN SOUTH CAROLINA'S PRISTINE NATURAL BEAUTY FITSNews - July 21, 2007 - We make fun of our home state a lot here on FITSNews - its worst-in-the-nation education system, anti-competitive tax code, 1895 government structure and free-spending "New Deal Republicans," and that's usually just us getting
Read story »S.C. Governor Counting The Unemployed Himself Now
FOR A GUY SO RIGHT ABOUT THE ECONOMY, HOW CAN SANFORD BE SO STUPID? FITSNews - July 20, 2007 - For his many faults, S.C. Gov. Mark Sanford has generally touted common sense economic reforms and sound tax cutting policy (well, at least until he surrendered the field on income tax relief this year). Of
Read story »Spark Up With 2008 Candidate Lighters
GOD BLESS RURAL SOUTH CAROLINA, PEOPLE FITSNews - July 20, 2007 - We're just pulling away from Hartsville, S.C. right now, which you'd think would put us miles away from all the sparks associated with the 2008 presidential primaries ... to say nothing of human beings who can walk upright. Yet to our
Read story »Sic Wilhelm Macht Urlaub
STATE HOUSE UNGUARDED AGAINST SHENANIGANS AS SIC WILLIE, FITS GIRLS VACATION AT THE BEACH FITSNews - July 20, 2007 - Memo to South Carolina politicians: If you're looking to pull any monkey business and get away with it, this is your week. Sic Willie and the FITS' gals will be spending the next nine
Read story »Political Pornification?
COLUMNIST DROPS BOMB ON THE CANDIDATE CRUSHERS FITSNews - July 20, 2007 - Ever since Obama Girl first sashayed her way into our hearts, America has been treated to a wave of risqué political videos featuring attractive babes bumping and grinding on behalf of their candidate of choice. The latest,
Read story »Amazing Fossil Find
SCIENTISTS UNCOVER "EGG-TOOTH" AMONG TREASURE TROVE OF NEW FOSSILS FITSNews - July 20, 2007 - We were thumbing through this morning's copy of the San Francisco Chronicle when we just happened to stumble upon this article about an amazing fossil find in the mountains of New Mexico. According to the
Read story »Who Will Fred Hire?
THOMPSON TEAM LOOKING AT S.C. LANDSCAPE FOR POTENTIAL 2008 HIRES FITSNews - July 19, 2007 - Although he hasn't formally announced his candidacy yet, there's no doubt that former Tennessee Senator Fred Thompson is running for president. And why not? Most polls show him as either the frontrunner or co-frontrunner
Read story »Will Yap For Food
CLEMSON PROFESSOR SUCKING UP FOR 2008 PRESIDENTIAL WORK FITSNews - July 19, 2007 - Things must be getting pretty tight for Clemson University professor Dave Woodard. You'd think the $82,443 a year salary (plus state benefits) that the taxpayers are shelling out for him to teach political science would
Read story »John Edwards Looks Like Alfalfa, Thinks You’re Stupid
CANDIDATE QUESTIONS AMERICA'S ATTENTION SPAN FITSNews - July 18, 2007 - Since we desperately needed a nap today, we decided to read yesterday's Washington Post story on John Edwards' flagging presidential candidacy. Sure enough, it worked like an Ambien. We fell asleep halfway through the article -
Read story »The Lindsay Lohan Sobriety Poll
DEMOCRACY IN ACTION, PEOPLE FITSNews - July 18, 2007 - Forget the presidential primaries, this morning's hottest poll is all about Lindsay Lohan. After a 45-day stint at Promises rehab, Lohan's ability to stay sober is the subject of an US Magazine online survey. As of 10:30 a.m. this morning, 77% of
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