SENATE DEMOCRATS’ ATTACK ON SANFORD PUSHES BOUNDARIES OF APPROPRIATENESS, EVEN FOR US
FITSNews – May 25, 2007 - It takes a lot for us to call something “inappropriate.” In fact, some would argue we invented the concept. It’s also no secret that we’re less than enthused by the recent performance of S.C. Gov. Mark Sanford, who in our opinion deserves most of what comes his way on this site as well as others. Having said that, Tuesday’s blog entry by the Senate Democratic Caucus surprised even us with its raunchiness.
In criticizing the governor (justifiably, we might add) for supporting legislation that would give his oceanfront home a hefty tax break, Senate Democratic operative Phil Bailey described the process as a “political back rub” from his friend Sen. Chip Campsen, one that could result in the governor receiving a “happy ending.” And no, he’s not talking about the kind of “happy ending” Winnie the Pooh gets when he finds a pot full of honey at the end of a long day.
“Happy ending,” for those of you unfamiliar with the term, is an expression used to describe the performance of a sex act at the end of a massage session. According to the Urban Dictionary’s definition, a happy ending occurs “when a massouse feels inclined to finish your session with oral sex.” Bailey then, is comparing Sanford’s “sweetheart deal” with Sen. Campsen to homosexual fellatio – or one man giving another man a blow job.
We’re not exactly sure where Bailey’s rhetoric falls within the Senate Democrats’ tradition of playing “an important role in many of the historic issues facing our state,” nor is it immediately clear how calling the governor (and Sen. Campsen, for that matter) a fag meshes with his website’s self-professed duty “to represent our constituents and present viable alternatives on critical issues.”
Maybe we’re missing something, but it seems to us like there are better ways of making what is otherwise a perfectly valid point regarding a piece of questionable legislation.
This isn’t the first time that slippery fingers (editor’s note: bad pun) have landed Bailey in hot water. In December 2005, he posted inflammatory anonymous comments on a popular local blog accusing former Gov. Carroll Campbell of inciting a race riot – the day after Campbell passed away.
State Sen. John Land, Chairman of the Senate Democratic Caucus, did not immediately return calls from FITSNews seeking comment, but Land refused to accept Bailey’s resignation two years ago following the Campbell comments.
Reaction to the blog post has already started pouring in.
“I assume you know what a ‘happy ending’ refers to in regard to a massage; if not, you should take that up with Mr. Bailey,” one letter addressed to Sen. Land reads. “It speaks very lowly of the Caucus and its ability to deliver its message that this is the sort of writing to which you are forced to resort.”
Stay tuned to FITSNews for more on this developing story …
By Radar May 25, 2007 at 12:29 pm
Poor Mr. Bailey .. thar he blows again. But right now, they have plausible deniability since he’s supposed to be working on the campaign of the Democratic candidate for the open Senate seat in Berkeley County.
By Nah,man. May 25, 2007 at 3:35 pm
You’ve seriously overstated the term “happy ending” to mean oral sex, man, and come on, you know it. A happy ending is not done orally it’s done manually– at least in most places in New York City and New Jersey and in contemporary fiction and TV shows such as a recent episode of HBO’s “Entourage” where Johnny Drama asks Turtle if he’d like to go get a “rub and tug.” Come on, Will, what kind of married businessman with kids would REALLY let one of those ladies put her mouth on him? There’s a reason those places are also called “Jack Shacks.” Ask Larry David, he gets a happy ending in an episode of “Curb Your Enthusiasm” when the woman asks if he’d like her to “finish him off.” The Urban Dictionary often overstates however, and at least you cited it. But the general public should understand oral sex after a massage, while probably done, if certainly not the industry standard in reference to a “happy ending.”
By FITSNews May 25, 2007 at 3:51 pm
Nah Man,
Thanks for the clarification. Let the record reflect then that the Senate Democratic Caucus blog was referring to a “hand job” as opposed to a “blow job.”
Good to know.
-FITSNews
By Bad Taste May 25, 2007 at 3:51 pm
Story? What developing story?
Politicians and political “consultants” with bad manners and offensive blog posts are common around the midlands and are not news to anyone with a life. Both the original blog post and this Fits post are childish and in bad taste. Oooops. I mean the both leave a bad taste in your mouth. Darn it. I mean they’re both tacky and childish. Yea, tacky and childish.
By Silence Dogood May 25, 2007 at 3:57 pm
Nah,man is completely correct. You need to get a new urban dictionary. “happy ending” in the massage business is refering to manual sex (weren’t you ever in a fraternity, beens to a mens locker room, been to a bachelor party et cetera, et cetera) – I have never even been to one of the massage parlors and I knew that is what it referred to. As for Mr. Bailey, maybe that is what he meant in order to ‘yank the governor’s chain,’ or he actually meant it would be a deal that had a happy ending and not sex reference whatsoever.
“Nothing is good or bad, only thinking makes it so.”
And of course by ‘yanking the governor’s chain’ about the ‘happy ending’ I just mean joking around not…
By Happy May 26, 2007 at 4:36 pm
the only way will can get a happy ending would be to pay for it