Florida Is Sneaky
STATE LOOKS TO TAKE A BITE OUT OF S.C. PRIMARY
FITSNews - May 22, 2007 - The State of Florida has officially moved its 2008 presidential primaries to January 29, leapfrogging a dozen other states and landing the Sunshine State’s voting on the same day as South Carolina’s … for now anyway. Republicans here in the Palmetto State have already vowed to secure an earlier date to protect our state’s “First in the South” status, and many are expecting Democrats to do the same.
It goes without saying that Floridians are a bunch of sneaky bastards, but we could honestly care less about this. To be honest, the fact that a state as stupid as ours has this much influence is ridiculous. It’s like fielding a Special Olympics team at the actual Olympics, or handing your credit card and car keys over to a bunch of crackheads and telling them to make sure they tank it up with premium unleaded after picking up the dry cleaning and dropping the kids off at school.
Come to think of it, maybe if they ordered primary dates by highest SAT scores or graduation rates we’d finally see some real education reform in this state …
Comments
By holly golightly on May 22nd, 2007 at 11:36 am
this is funny..
By Ducky on May 22nd, 2007 at 12:12 pm
Tis funny. Florida does not count as the south anyway…too many transplants from up north
By yep on May 22nd, 2007 at 12:13 pm
nice visualization but I bet a most crackheads are better drivers than my wife anyway.
By Newspaper Hack on May 23rd, 2007 at 2:39 pm
@ Ducky
The Florida panhandle is aggressively Southern, though. One guy called me “half-yankee” because I was living in Richmond, Va. I figured it was pointless to argue with him, even though I lived within walking distance of the four-story tall Robert E. Lee monument. And the JEB Stuart monument, the Jeff Davis monument, the Stonewall Jackson monument, blah blah blah. I’m convinced there’s a Confederate shadow congress meeting somewhere off I-10.
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