OLD PEOPLE ARE SO CUTE WHEN THEY FORGET THINGS FITSNews - April 26, 2007 - So U.S. Sen. John McCain is officially "announcing" his candidacy for the Presidency of the United States in Columbia, S.C. this afternoon. At least that's what his campaign schedule says. Hold up a minute, though ... didn't
Read story »Archive for April, 2007
Flipper Is Already On National Television
ROMNEY MAKES FIRST NATIONWIDE CABLE TELEVISION BUY FITSNews - April 25, 2007 - Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney is the first presidential candidate to run ads on nationwide cable television. At least that's what CNN says. Unlike FITSNews, though, you never know if what those communist sons of bitches
Read story »When Sanford “Attacks”
WATCH OUT FOR FLYING MEXICANS, PEOPLE FITSNews - April 25, 2007 - We kept hearing rumors last week that S.C. Gov. Mark Sanford was going to run television ads blistering the S.C. Senate for its wasteful spending and failure to use a $1.3 billion surplus to provide meaningful tax relief to the people
Read story »Beans, Beans, Good For The Heart
THE MORE MUSEUMS YOU BUILD TO 'EM ... FITSNews - April 25, 2007 - When we first broke the news about the state budget including $950,000 for a green bean museum, we were certain the white hot glare of our raw, unbridled truth would be more than enough to cause legislators to think twice about this
Read story »Here Comes The Gliese 581, Little Darlin’
EARTH-LIKE PLANET FOUND HALFWAY AROUND THE GALAXY FITSNews - April 24, 2007 - Scientists have found an earth-like planet some 20.5 light years away in outer space, the first time in history that a celestial body capable of sustaining life as we know it has ever been discovered outside our solar system.
Read story »Does America Have The Stomach For War Anymore?
SIGNS POINT TO "NO" FITSNews - April 24, 2007 - We were sitting at Old Ebbitt Grill in Washington, D.C. with a powerful U.S. Attorney a few weeks ago when he made a comment that has stuck in our heads ever since. "America doesn't have what it takes to fight wars these days," he told us. "Our soldiers
Read story »Consumer Confidence Down In April
A-ROD CONFIDENCE THROUGH THE ROOF, THOUGH FITSNews - April 24, 2007 - Consumer confidence in April fell to its lowest level since last August, a sign that rising gas prices are dampening Americans' view of the economy, elevating inflationary risks and potentially heralding a "softening of growth." Yet
Read story »S.C. Legislators Unveil “Sanford Clock”
BIG BEN-SIZE CLOCK MONITORS HOW MUCH TIME MARK SANFORD HAS LEFT IN S.C. GOVERNOR'S OFFICE FITSNews - April 23, 2007 - Hours after S.C. Gov. Mark Sanford unveiled a spending clock to track how fast taxpayer dollars disappear in Columbia, state legislators unveiled a "Sanford Clock" to track how much
Read story »There’s No Pfriggin’ Way We’re Going To See “Stardust”
PFEIFFER'S PFILM UNDER THE RADAR OF SUMMER BLOCKBUSTERS ... AND WITH GOOD REASON PFITSNews - April 23, 2007 - We were scrolling through our list of summer movies to avoid when we came upon the web site for "Stardust," which damn near broke our poor computer with all its pfriggin' interactive pfoolishness. Any
Read story »Is John McCain’s Strongest S.C. Supporter Pulling Back?
LINDSAY ... ER, LINDSEY'S CAMP SAYS "ABSOLUTELY NOT" FITSNews - April 23, 2007 - The FITSNews' inbox was literally awash with e-mails this weekend from politicos who attended the Richland County Republican Party Convention in Columbia, S.C. on Saturday. Without exception, they all wanted to know if
Read story »Aye Cabana Boy
SUPERGIRL LANDS IN SOUTH CAROLINA? FITSNews - April 23, 2007 - Ever since he saw this picture earlier today, our very own Sic Willie has been "stuck" in a tree in our front yard. Making cat noises. Apparently, he thinks he is going to be rescued or something. What an idiot. If that Supergirl isn't
Read story »Dolphin Dollars Bought Straw Poll
SALON REPORT: FLIPPER FUNDS VOTES FOR HIMSELF FITSNews - April 23, 2007 - If this article from Salon.com is to be believed, former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney is buying straw poll votes in South Carolina. Of course since we could care less about straw polls, our focus from this article centers around
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