FITS Fartknockers In First

bad news bears

SIC WILLIE’S FANTASY TEAM IS, DARE WE SAY, “EN FUEGO”

FITSNews – April 29, 2007 – One month into the 2007 fantasy baseball season, Sic Willie’s FITS Fartknockers are putting a hurting on the competition, cruising to the league lead in four of eight statistical categories and opening up a 10-point cushion in the standings. Paced by stars like Jimmy Rollins and David “Big Papi” Ortiz, the Fartknockers are hitting a league-leading .302 with 41 home runs and 182 RBI’s. The FITS’ pitching staff also boasts a league-leading 2.23 ERA.

“I know Rudy Giuliani likes the Yankees, John McCain likes the Diamondbacks and Mitt Romney likes whichever team he thinks will get him the most votes, but these suckas better recognize,” Sic Willie told listeners during ESPN’s Sunday Night Baseball telecast. “The fact is my Fartknockers are knocking on the door of fantasy baseball immortality.”

Come to think of it, this makes perfect sense. After all, with an imaginary political consulting firm and a roster full of imaginary clients, why wouldn’t Sic Willie excel at fantasy baseball?

UPDATE – Sic Willie’s interview was apparently with Teddy Garland of WRDU in Durham, the “Voice of the Bulls,” not ESPN.

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