RAP “MOGUL” ALLEGEDLY PUNCHES MAN, THREATENS TO HAVE FLAMES COME OUT HIS ARSE
FITSNews – March 6, 2007 - Rapper “Puff Daddy”, or “P-Diddy”, or “Diddy” – or whatever the hell this no talent “rapper” is calling himself these days – got sued today for allegedly punching a man in the face and yelling something about having flames come out of his arse. Duddy’s lawyers deny the whole thing, to which Heckler Spray says:
We’ve suffered through ten years of awful Diddy rapping, and to come this close to discovering that flames actually come out of your arse when Diddy hits you – only to discover it’s all lies – might just push us over the edge, you know.
The flaming arse punch is actually something we invented, and still use on occasion. It’s great for when a crowd of attackers is coming at you, trying to kill you, because you can just knock the crap out of the first person in line and watch as the rest of them get consumed by the flames of perdition. Then when you go to help up the first guy and he says “holy sh*t, you just made flames come out my arse to roast all my fellow attackers in the flames of perdition!” you get to say “Why yes, yes I did. Now go and tell your friends this playground will stay drug free for the children or I’ll turn your ass a flamethrower again.”