South Carolina’s “Brady Bill” Offends Sic Willie

Joan Brady

THE SUDAFED IS BECAUSE HE HAS A COLD, PEOPLE, NOT BECAUSE HE WANTS TO START A METH LAB

FITSNews – February 15, 2007 - Sic Willie is feeling a little under the weather today, so he drove down to the local pharmacy to get some Sudafed for his cold.

Boy, was he in for a surprise. Thanks to S.C. Rep. Joan Brady (pictured above), anybody purchasing a box of Sudafed in the State of South Carolina now has to sign their life away on an official government registry (a.k.a. Big Brother). The checkout clerks even tell you, “It’s state law.”

We thought Sudafed made you drowsy, but apparently there is something in it that if you are an anarchist and a drug addict and a chemist all rolled up into the same person (and you buy like 1,000,000 boxes of the stuff), you can make like a gram of crystal meth or something. Nice. All Sic Willie wanted was for his head to stop hurting. Sudafed. Crystal Meth. Whatever.

UPDATE - Funny text message exchange:

Claypool: Joan hates it when you write about her.
Sic Willie: I hate it when Joan wastes my time at the drug store.

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Comments

  1. By Laurin February 16, 2007 at 12:16 am

    And don’t waste your time on “Sudafed PE.” Pretty sure it stands for “Sudafed: Placebo Effect.”

    Reply

  2. By tammy February 16, 2007 at 1:30 am

    Nothing works.

    Feel better.

    :-) t

    Reply

  3. By yunahalo February 16, 2007 at 4:37 am

    Ya do know, it’s alot easier to just buy the meth. Dealers don’t ask questions.

    Reply

  4. By *jcg February 16, 2007 at 8:31 am

    Thing is, all you have to do is leave that store and go to another one. Some places you can buy it straight out, some you have to see the pharmacist, some you can sign your life away at the register. In my experience, there’s no regularity to it.
    And yes, it ticks me off to no end…

    Reply

  5. By *jcg February 16, 2007 at 8:32 am

    (feel better. if sudafed doesn’t work — try mucinex d with some dimetapp.)

    Reply

  6. By Earl February 16, 2007 at 9:30 am

    Forget that – it’s easier to just buy crack. They don’t make you sign paperwork, ask for IDs, don’t charge sales tax and you can tell those in the business are strong Second Amendment advocates.

    Gotta love businessmen who cut through red tape for their customers and support our constitutional liberties!

    Reply

  7. By fitsnews February 16, 2007 at 11:38 am

    Just for the record, when we say we are “operating out of a converted methamphetamine lab near the famous Gallivants Ferry stump in the Upper Conway Lower Aynor region of South Carolina,” all meth baking equipment was removed prior to our arrival to make way for our operations.

    Turning that meth lab into a truth serum factory is just one of our many social betterment programs.

    Reply

  8. By Don Johnson February 16, 2007 at 11:45 am

    Speaking of just buying the meth, I wonder if you could buy the meth, and then boil it back down to Sudafed. That might be worth it. Hell, it might be cheaper, too.

    Reply

  9. By Mixmaster Mike February 16, 2007 at 2:37 pm

    No one would argue that Joan Brady is our smartest representative but, unlike Sen. Ford, she manages to avoid drooling in public. Most of the time.

    Thanks for your “service,” Representative Joan!

    Reply

  10. By Earl February 17, 2007 at 2:00 am

    Don, if he did that, wouldn’t he have to fill out a form once he made it back into Sudafed?

    Reply

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