Shrub’s Speech
PRESIDENT GIVES STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS LAST NIGHT
FITSNews – January 24, 2007 – President George W. Bush (a.k.a. Shrub) delivered his sixth State of the Union address yesterday evening, despite the fact that only 34% of the nation approves of the job he is doing as president.
We might have just phoned it in with those kind numbers, but then again we are not perseverer-ers like Shrub.
Anyway, the speech focused on domestic issues, since the War in Iraq is pretty much the reason the president’s poll numbers are slightly south of real crappy.
Shrub wants us to be energy independent, have better health care, extend the No Child Left Behind plan and save Social Security.
All of which sound great. Really. We are cool with all of that, Mr. President.
We even liked the part when Shrub told crazy, race-baiting Republicans like Tom Tancredo “No Wall For You” on the immigration issue.
Everyone should know by now that building a wall on the Mexican border is not a good idea.
Why not? Because Mexicans are clever people. Like Benicio Del Toro and Jimmy Smits have been clever in every movie and TV show that we have ever seen them in. They will just come up with some human-bucket-slingshot device that shoots them over the wall into matresses or something. And then there is digging, which has also been known to work. And swimming, too.
Perhaps the most amazing thing about last night was not once did Dick Cheney and Nancy Pelosi start randomly making out with each other behind Shrub.
Comments
By ELISE on January 24th, 2007 at 7:08 pm
Yeah, I saw the sexual tension there too!
By CB on January 25th, 2007 at 2:26 pm
Hmmm. So now Shrub supports insurance for the poor, addressing the concerns of global warming and reducing our dependency on foreign oil.
Anybody remember Al Gore’s campaign issues during his failed bid against our dear president. Pretty much the same stuff. And by “pretty much,” I mean “exactly.”
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