$2.5 Million Buys A Lot Of Hate Mail, Etc.

ROMNEY’S BIG FINANCIAL DAY LIKELY TO … YEAH, WE JUST CAN’T GET INTERESTED IN THIS ARTICLE EITHER

FITSNews – January 8, 2007 - Washington Post blogger extraordinaire Chris Cillizza is reporting this afternoon that former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney took in $2.5 million today in what his exploratory committee dubbed “National Call Day.”

The all-day Raise-A-Thon (which probably started several weeks ago) kicked off the governor’s 2008 fundraising efforts, which Romney hopes will culminate with him raising more than $100 million for his Presidential campaign.

This is sweet. Really. It’s almost exactly like one of those muscular dystrophy telethons except instead of being for disabled people, it’s for Mitt Romney. And in addition to being in good health, doesn’t this guy already have more money than God? Or whoever Mormons believe in?

Anyway, a lot of that cash money will be headed in the direction of the Palmetto State, most of it to veteran GOP consultant Warren Tompkins, who is managing Romney’s South Carolina campaign.

Famous for his full-frontal (and highly successful) assault on the insurgent John McCain campaign in 2000, the “Tompkins’ Method” is old school, Lee Atwater, gutter-style politics.

In fact, we thought we may have detected the scent of Tompkins’ minions in an otherwise insignificant little e-mail we received the other day from this cleverly-titled address: mccainsucks@gmail.com.

Very subtle.

Of course, as we wrote nine months ago in a little treatise entitled “THE IMPENDING FALL OF J. WARREN TOMPKINS,” the Old Mudslingers’ brand of smashmouth messaging has reached a point of diminishing returns in South Carolina.

Tompkins has won only one major race in the eight years since Bush’s 2000 victory (Jim DeMint’s U.S. Senate win in 2004), and couldn’t get a single one of his candidates out of the GOP Primaries in 2006.

Heck, you could probably give Warren Tompkins $2 million for a down ballot statewide race like Treasurer these days and he’d lose it.

Wait … that just happened.

FUN WITH VIDEOS

We don’t post videos on this version of FITSNews, but we do link to them.

It’s called cost-effectiveness, fool. But don’t worry, the new FITSNews will have all of that. And a big ole bag of Lay’s KC Masterpiece BBQ potato chips too, sucka.

Anyway, most of our audience will be familiar with the first two chips … sorry … clips we’re linking to today, as they have already taken the nation by storm (Saturday Night Live’s Lazy Sunday and subsequent “Special Christmas Package“).

But we doubt many of you have seen this one, which we must warn you is very, very, very NSFW (Not Safe For Work). In fact, it’s probably the most NSFW thing we’ve ever linked to. But funny. Especially when the little monkey starts climbing up the tree to see what the two big monkeys are doing. Basically, if you don’t want to get fired from your job, we recommend plugging in some headphones to your computer when you watch it.

Oh, and to our Holmes $D’Brickashaw up in Va-Shizzle, thanks for the tip. Turns out we posted it after all. Monkey balls, $D, monkey balls.

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